Core Issues: Season Three
by Nicolle
Summary: A season of unconnected one shots related to the Core Issues series.
1. Ep 1 - Gone Fishing

Core Issues: Season Three

by Nicolle

Disclaimer: Undertale belongs to Toby Fox. G!Sans (who is taking a break from being our narrator) and G!Paps belong to Borurou. Underfell is a community project. This story is copyright to me.

Special Disclaimer: Inktale Sans belongs to Comyet. Calcium Man belongs to Kry and Exekyl. Flowerfell belongs to Sanei.

Special Note: This season will consist of unconnected one shots and will come out on the same schedule as before. Because these are one shots, if you have any suggestions for a future story, a favorite character you want to see again, or even a question that you'd like to see addressed, please let me know!

1\. My husband, who is my long suffering beta, asked me to write this one and even told me what the plot would be. So this episode is a gift to him. :)

2\. Rated T for language, sexual themes/jokes, and violence.

3\. If you are an artist and are so inclined, my beta humbly requests a picture with Cross out fishing on the boat with the shadow of a huge monster under the water.

Ep. 1 - Gone Fishing  
(Cross is our narrator.)

It was a beautiful morning. The sun was shining. The birds were singing.

And Michelle's radiant face was covered in blood.

I sat bolt upright in the tent, gasping, drenched from having sweated through my clothing. I flopped on my back and stared at the roof of my tent.

I hadn't had that particular nightmare since Asriel removed Chara from my head.

I sat up and pulled my shirt off, flinching a little at the scar that ran across my chest. A constant reminder of a day I still wished I could forget. Though now that I didn't have an A.I. constantly keeping me focused on it, the memories were starting to get fuzzy. The nightmare always ended with Michelle's death, though she was the one I'd shot first. I didn't want her to see the rest of her loved ones die.

I finished changing into another shirt, pulled on a pair of pants over my boxers, and laced up my shoes. I had a very vague memory of the reset. Of being a child and seeing Sans for the first time. I'd been completely unaware of the past and Sans had been so distraught that his eye wouldn't stop glowing a bright yellow. Papyrus had completely broken script, falling to his knees, and hugging me close.

I don't remember much else or if I'd journeyed any further.

Blue pulled me aside after Fase had pulled us back, taking me out to a balcony surrounded by a mass of green, the building that housed Fase being completely covered in plants. He looked over the incredibly white and incredibly clean city and took so long I wondered if he'd fallen asleep.

"*i've seen this go two ways. when leaving the decision to me, you grow up, completely free of the past that haunts you. your skelebros keep you as their little brother and you don't face asgore until you reach adulthood. when i give the decision to frisk, any frisk, they pull you back. the part that connects all of you cannot bear to lose you. even for a second." He'd looked over his shoulder at Church and Bones. "*frisk was so distraught battling you she couldn't sleep and often didn't eat. bones named it obsession, but the truth is that every frisk involved was desperate to get you back. it's why red's little sister solved for prime instead of teleporting away."

I'd stared at him, open mouthed, unsure what to say. And eventually realized that I didn't have to say anything.

Crawling out of the tent, I worked on putting breakfast together. I spotted the eye sockets on my right immediately. Damn but the Sans-es who came to check up on me where BAD at stealth. Blue didn't even try to hide. He just napped in the boat while I was out on the lake. At this point, I don't think they're checking up on me as much as they're pranking me.

Yons Lake was large and beautiful, and I had a found a quiet spot to enjoy it. The morning sunlight glittered across the indigo surface underneath a cloudless, sapphire sky. Large trees, full with summer green, hung low to the water on all sides with the exception of a beach about a ten minute walk to the east. Sentinel evergreens reached high into the air like stone guardians on a watch that would never end. The early risers were out in their boats, fishing lines already in the water, while the families camping near the beach still slept.

Church made the best cup of camp coffee I'd ever had, but mine wasn't too bad. I sipped while I sketched the dream I'd been enjoying before the nightmare interrupted it. Michelle dancing at her brother's wedding, face glowing, eyes filled with joy.

I hadn't seen her face when she'd died. She wasn't facing me when I pulled the trigger. I didn't turn her over to see the damage I'd done. She died not knowing that I killed her.

I shut the sketchbook with a snap. Time to get to work.

After cleaning up breakfast, I loaded my gear in my little, all purpose, fishing boat. It was black with a big red swish on the side, and perfect for those days when I just wanted to do nothing in the middle of nowhere. I wondered if I would be the only one 'hunting' the waters today. It was Saturday, so I was willing to bet at least two more people would be out for the same reason I was. And we could always identify each other, regardless of whether or not our particular equipment was on hand. It was a strange giddiness around eyes that knew better and the anticipation of a truly big catch. That would make the hours spent chasing something that didn't exist feel less like madness and more like fun.

"*where's your fishing license, piss ant?"

I tipped my hat back and looked up at Red. He was in his standard red shirt, black shorts with yellow stripe, red high tops, and fur lined, black leather jacket. I glanced to my right. The eye sockets were still there, watching. What if there's only one Sans watching me this entire time and I'm over thinking it? It would explain the poor stealth skills.

I secured my equipment in the boat. "Hey, Red. Babysitting me today?"

He snorted. "*nah. sugar blossom said you were out here hunting lake monsters and that i had to see."

I hopped from the dock into my boat. "You're welcome to tag along."

Red shrugged, but I could see it in his crimson eye sockets. After lifetimes spent chasing mathematical impossibilities, he wasn't going to let the logical fallacies of pseudo-science, or his dislike of me in general, keep him from getting in the boat. He stepped on without hesitating.

"*what's our procedure?"

"Start at the west end of the lake bed and scan going east. My equipment has great depth range, but terrible width. It'll take several passes before we get a picture of the lake bed."

"*then get us in gear."

I pulled the boat out into the water, heading for the west end of the lake. "Has your sister decided about school yet?"

"*she's accepted the princeton offer for their cosmology program." Red smirked. "*that interview was a fucking riot! those poor bastards came into the lab expecting to meet a distinguished monster. instead they got an eighteen year old girl with florescent pink and orange hair who told them flat out that princeton only made the top of her list because if she got too bored with the cosmology work, she could also pick up courses in string theory and plasma."

His smile. "*when one of them called foul, she used magic to summon a model of his most recent experiment and explained in excruciating detail how it was wrong. that was all it took for them to fall all over themselves to get her to sign the paperwork." He sighed as he knelt. "*later she told me that she stopped before she could explain to the guy that he should feel bad for being wrong. the universe gives me the sweetest girl in the world and i've managed to turn her into a cheeky brat."

"That doesn't count as a win?"

Red eyed me. "*ass. your equipment calibrated?"

"Not since yesterday."

"*on it."

"How did Frisk manage to get into New Home U at such a young age? I'm not saying she didn't belong there to start. I just want know the story."

Red carefully tuned the scanner. "*that's my fault actually. i was such an asshole back in new home high the principal said that while she had been obligated to deal with me when i was a student, she wasn't going to look at my skull during a parent teacher association meeting. so she sat frisk down with the university entrance exam. and that exam is rough. i remember taking it and thinking that the test maker was fucking insane. she aced the exam and new home u was happy to have her."

He sat back on his haunches watching the scanner read out. "*it was honestly a really good move. several of the students formed a group to help her maintain a normal social life that was age appropriate. we're calibrated."

I pulled my boat around for the first pass, water lapping lightly at the sides of the hull.

"*you know we aren't gonna find anything."

I snorted. "Of course not! But we might find something else."

"*i'll bite. what else?"

"The day I got here a bunch of little kids were jumping around about seeing the lake monster. Ten of them. They said it's head was bigger than any of them were tall and it was white. All ten described the exact same thing." I picked up my water bottle and took a sip. "That night, four boats were overturned by the north docks. The north docks are where the big yachts are moored. My first full day here there were no disturbances, but my scan picked up this."

I tossed him a rolled up sheaf of paper. He opened it and looked at the obvious impression of a large creature against the lake bed.

"When I saw that, I went diving to look for it but only found depressions in the mud where it had been sitting. My second day here, two separate fishermen had lines from boat rigs snap. Both said whatever they initially caught, dragged their boats around before the line cut. The third day out, a family reported seeing a giant head peaking out of the water. The mother described a head that was gray on top and white on the bottom with big, empty eyes. And it doesn't match any of the descriptions of the legendary lake monster that people actually come here to look for. Yonsy, monster that's supposed to be at Yons Lake, is a giant octopus."

"*holy shit. there's something out here."

"There's something out here."

Red chuckled. "*let's see if I can get this scanner to give us better range." Something caught his eye socket. "*check it out. the retirees are out fishing today."

I let off the throttle and had a look at the shore. Church's mother and Asgore were heading out for their Saturday fishing date. Grace was tall and lean and brown from years of being out in the sun as a landscaper. Neatly dressed in khaki shorts and a floral Hawaiian button down, I was pretty sure she didn't actually own a skirt. It was the complete opposite of her daughter, who didn't seem to know what pants were off duty. Asgore matched Grace's attire, though that was very likely accidental. The retired goat king had a serious collection of Hawaiian shirts.

Red gave them a wave. "hey there, sugar lips!" He dipped his skull slightly to Asgore. "*your highness. how's retirement treating you?"

Grace brought the boat along side mine. "Nice now that my daughter is too busy being pregnant to rush into danger."

I rolled my eyes. "I can't tell if that's a swipe at me or just a general comment."

Grace smiled. "I'm not back handing you, Frisk. She ran into danger long before you you were involved." Grace reached across the water to tug on Red's sleeve. "So what are you two doing out here? Chasing lake monsters?"

"*Yes," we both said.

Asgore looked at Grace and then at me. "The one with the gray white head and long neck?"

"*that's the one."

Grace elbowed Asgore. "I told you something was out here."

My jaw dropped. "You're one of us?"

"Yes." She looked at Asgore for a moment. "Don't tell my daughter."

"I'm just worried it's a monster causing trouble."

Red smiled wide. "*come on, your highness! we would never do that!"

Asgore raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth twitching as he fought a smile. "Sans."

Red held up both boney hands in mock surrender.

Grace clapped her hands once, blue eyes reflecting the glitter of the water's surface. "Let's get started! We're heading up to the north docks. We'll call if we find any..." She trailed off and we followed her gaze. A massive black shadow passed under our boats. It pulled a blue and gray fishing boat like mine behind it at a fast clip.

"*oh fuck." Red summoned a bone and sent it through the fishing line dragging the boat. It slowed to a crawl and bumped against Grace's craft. The two teens on board the boat were watching the shadow, eyes wide with fear.

I grabbed my snorkel, but before I could jump in, the monster bucked up against my boat, sending Red and I to the deck. I grabbed the side to get my feet under me just in time to feel the boat heave again. I smacked up against the hull and let the momentum flip me into the water. I grabbed a hold of the nearest piece of the monster and my hand slipped against the slimy surface. The kick up from the lake bed made it impossible to see. I turned and swam for the surface. A tentacle wrapped around my leg in the dark and pulled me down.

A large, gray mass slammed into the monster and it let go of my leg. I kicked for the surface. A hand grabbed my jacket and Asgore lifted me out of the water. He set me on the deck and I coughed out the water I'd swallowed.

Grace knelt in front of me, looking at my leg where my pants had been ripped away. Several circular bruises wrapped around my leg. She touched them gently. "These are suction bruises. Like you get from an octopus."

Red grimaced as he squeezed the water out of the fur lining on his hood. "*you've got to be kidding me. what the hell are we chasing?"

"I don't know." I looked up at Asgore's golden mane and Red's crimson eyes. "Did either of you hit it with a magical attack?"

Asgore shook his head, while Red frowned.

"Something big slammed into whatever grabbed me and knocked it hard enough that it let go."

"Two lake monsters?" Grace shook her head, brown hair swinging. "Yonsy is a myth." She touched my leg again. "Maybe." She pulled out a piece of Church's homemade monster candy, and handed it to me.

I popped the candy before pulling off my jacket. I looked at my boat. It hadn't capsized, which was a small miracle, and my equipment was intact. Though I wasn't sure how much water damage it had taken. The teens sitting in the boat next to us looked relieved to see that the lake monsters were gone, but had no idea what to do now that two real monsters stood on the boat in front of theirs.

Well. Three if you counted me.

Grace sorted the kids out while Red and I hopped back over to access damage. The hull of the ship was fine, but my equipment had taken too much water. "Looks like we're stuck trawling the lake bed." I groaned. "Doing that kicks up too much dirt to see if we actually hit something."

"We can dive it," Asgore said. He smiled. "We can tie a rope to Sans and let him just walk the bottom since he doesn't need to breath."

Red shrugged. "*okay."

Grace eyed him suspiciously. "Okay?"

"*sure. but if i get eaten by a lake monster, you have to tell my brother."

"What about your sister?" I asked.

Red snorted. "*she'll just roll her eyes and access her last save. papyrus is the one you gotta worry about. it's been six years and he's only just gotten over me being at the lab all day."

"Just in time for him to be worried at your sister going to grad school?" I pressed.

Red groaned. "*i have no idea how i'm going to deal with that one." He pulled off his coat and finished drying it with fire magic before tossing it to Grace. "*keep it warm for me, sugar?"

Grace chuckled as she pulled it on. "You're such a hound."

"*nah. that'd be your son-in-law."

Asgore nodded in agreement. "I still find it fascinating that Dr. Gaster had such a facet to his personality."

"*they've all got something. i still can't get over my father's snoopy collection."

I watched Red closely to see if he was lying. "Really?"

He pulled out his phone and showed me a picture of a storage room from the Lab converted into a small museum of white dogs with black ears and their little yellow bird companions. "*his girlfriend lured him out of the lab to her timeline with a pair of snoopy swim trunks and a snoopy beach towel." Red sighed, smile soft. "*that was a blessedly peaceful week in the lab."

Asgore tapped Grace's shoulder. "I'll moor our boat. You watch the boys."

Grace smiled and hopped over to my craft.

Red grabbed a rope and lifted his red shirt to wind it through his ribs and around his spine. When he was happy it was secure. He tied the other end to the boat and jumped in. I pulled off my shirt and shoes, and followed, snorkel in place. Red sank gracefully to the lake bed, his clothing lifting around him. He landed softly, red high tops gently resting on mud. Shoving his boney hands in the pockets of his shorts, he headed in the direction the shadows had gone.

Lacking the jacket, the red of his shirt muted, you could easily mistake him for Blue in that indigo darkness. They shared the same gait, the same laid back motions. He stopped for a moment and looked around before pointing north. I could just make out something in the haze. I wondered, not for the first time, what any Sans actually saw through their eye sockets.

Surfacing, I pulled my snorkel out of my mouth. "Head directly North."

Asgore and Grace both nodded, turning the boat in that direction. I put my snorkel back in my mouth and swam after Red.

Red stood on the edge of a steep drop off in the lake, waiting for me to catch up. A tentacle shot out of the darkness and wrapped around his leg, jerking him into the nothing. I dived after him only to have the entire area light up a bright candy apple red. Multiple glowing bones illuminated a deep trench in the lake bed and a massive orange and green octopus. Red grabbed one of his bones and used it like a club to smash the tentacle grabbing his leg.

The octopus let go and moved out of the trench, all eight tentacles thrashing. The thing was absolutely huge, making Red look tiny in front of it. This thing could easily smash any boat on the water. Red hung there in the glow, content to dodge each attack while using his bones to block. I used his distraction to surface for a breath and dive again. I swam around the back. It was too big to attack and it'd see a swipe at it's eyes before I could connect.

It caught sight of me and grabbed my legs, pulling me down fast. A white and gray mass shot over me, grabbing the octopus with it's claws. Big, boney claws. A boney tail with a sharp spike on the end swung over my head.

Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

The octopus let go and I surfaced, lungs burning. I dived again and found Red, standing on the edge of the trench, filming the fight with a GoPro.

The octopus and the 'lake monster' thrashed against each other. Tentacles wrapped around the bone dragon's rib cage. The dragon spun in the water like a crocodile with prey in it's mouth, shoving it against the wall of the trench. The octopus splayed out, revealing the hard beak of its insanely large mouth. The tentacles pulled the rib cage toward the beak, only to have the beak smashed by a clawed fist. The tentacles threw the dragon into the mud before wrapping it up again.

They seemed evenly matched in strength but the bone dragon had the advantage of magic. A glowing yellow circle filled with arcane symbols appeared between the two. The dragon's head smashed through the golden seal, coating itself in magic, and biting hard into the octopus' massive, orange head. It let go of the dragon, swimming away quickly.

Red cackled soundlessly under the water, clearly enjoying the spectacle. He jerked his thumb up and we both swum to the surface. Sans popped up next to me in the water, transformed back into his normal, skeleton self.

Red pulled himself up onto the boat. "*well, your highness, it's not one of your monsters playing pranks on the locals."

I looked at my skelebro. "What the hell, Sans?"

He smiled way too big. "*Well, I WAS trying to prank you, but the giant octopus legend turned out to be the real deal."

"*yeah. and i can't wait to show your brother the fight footage!"

"*Oh My God. No. He'll kill me!"

Red laughed while Sans' clavicles sank.

"Please tell me you have something decent to wear," Grace said.

Sans suddenly blushed a bright yellow. I'm not sure how a skeleton monster does that. "Sorry, Mrs. Church!" He reached into the void within himself, pulling out shirt and pants to dress.

Grace took my boat back to the docks. "Now what? We know Yonsy's down there and big enough to be dangerous, but how do we get it out of the lake?"

"*good question. there's a massive trench in the lake bed and it could hide in any part of it. but i'm really curious as to how it even got in there in the first place. this lake has no ocean access and that's a salt water octopus."

"A new species?" Asgore conjectured. "It's rare, but not the first time."

Grace sighed as she put my boat into the slip. "We won't be able to get any help on getting it out from the authorities. Our only proof is Red's video and they'll say it's a CGI get up."

"So why don't we talk to Asriel about it?" I asked. I hopped to the dock and caught the rope Asgore tossed me.

"Yet another thing for my son to deal with," Asgore sighed. "Though I think this may prove to be a nice distraction for him." He offered Grace his arm. "If we hurry, we can still make lunch with Frisk and Bones."

Grace slipped of Red's jacket and handed it to him before taking Asgore's arm. "See you three later!"

I shook my head and started for my camp site, Sans and Red following behind.

"*nice scar. sugar plum give you that one?"

I looked down at my chest, thinking about my answer. "No. My fiance's brother." I sighed, wishing I hadn't left my shirt in the boat when I pulled my shoes back on.

Red didn't follow up. Maybe he'd caught something in my tone I didn't intend.

"So what's with the Sans that's been watching me all week?"

Red looked over at the skeleton hiding, poorly, behind a tree. "*hey inky! what gives?"

A Sans I'd not seen before came out from behind the tree. One eye a blue dot, the other glowing yellow star, he wore a pair of brown shorts and a brown shirt under a dark painters vest and bandoleer of paint and pencils across his chest. An overly long scarf wrapped around his neck while a massive paintbrush hung from his back like a sword. Ink splatter covered his skull. He clutched a tube tightly to his chest, the kind you kept art prints in before framing.

He held the tube out to me, eye sockets squeezed shut. "*please sign this!"

I took the tube, curious to see which print was inside. Was it Calcium Man? The one with the Frisk covered in flowers? I opened the tube and instead of a print, I found a carefully rolled canvas. I shuddered and stared at a portrait of Michelle. The one I'd painted the day I'd proposed.

"*you didn't sign it! and i love it so much that i couldn't just let that be and i know that your timeline is gone and that they'll never be another painting like this and that-"

I held out a hand. "May I borrow a brush?"

"*oh yeah!" He pulled one from his belt, still wet from the last thing he'd painted with it.

I signed the bottom, making sure that my signature didn't touch her.

The little skeleton practically squealed when I handed the painting back to him, dancing happily before disappearing into the void.

Red elbowed me. "*you all right?"

I noticed Sans watching me the way he did when he was worried.

I gave him a smile. "Sure! You can't spell painting without pain."


	2. Ep 2 - Osiris

Core Issues: Season Three

by Nicolle

Disclaimer: Undertale belongs to Toby Fox. This story is copyright to me.

Special Disclaimer: ColonyTale AU belongs to me.

1\. This one shot is littered with a ton of generation ship fiction and movie references. A skele-ton!

2\. Rated T for language, sexual themes/jokes, and violence.

3\. If you really like this episode, I am writing ColonyTale as it's own fic that follows Frisk through her first adventure on the colony ship Delta. Keep your eyes open for the first chapter next week!

Ep 2 - Osiris

(ColonyTale Napstablook is our narrator!)

"*why do i let you convince me to do these things!"

"Because you love it!"

The roller coaster car swung past me, spinning so as to send Frisk and Sans backwards down the rail. Frisk, eyes green yellow, giggled uncontrollably while Sans grasped tightly at the grab bar, smile wide despite holding on for dear life. At the end of the ride, both were laughing hysterically, half falling over each other as they exited the gates and walked down the midway of Aura Park in the Long Sun Biome. They stopped under the tree that marked the meeting place for the school group they spent their off days chaperoning around the colony ship Delta.

I followed along, staying discreetly out of sight while they waited for the children, a group of thrill seeking teens, to exit the ride. These trips, while fun, were mandatory for children on the ship. Five hundred or so years back, the Dreemurr family had noticed a marked increase in monsters never leaving their home biomes, never seeing any other part of the ship. This led to problems of isolationism among the different monster species. A new law went into effect almost immediately that children would go on several mandatory field trips during their schooling years in order to see that their world was far bigger than the biome they lived in. The result was that every monster on the trip was well traveled, though the ship was so big, few ever got to see all of it.

Frisk's multi hued cybernetic eyes watched the exit gate of the ride while Sans checked his data pad for updates on current cases from his brother. Sans, in his white shirt, black shorts, and bare, boney feet, hardly looked like a police officer. Only the Delta Rune badge sewn on his blue hoodie gave any indication that he was law enforcement. Frisk, with her camera ever ready, could easily be a photographer if she wanted, but worked as Prince Asriel's engineering second.

It made for a long commute from our home in the Waterfall Biome.

I still couldn't believe, even twenty years later, that she'd agreed to live with me. When looking for a place to live after the long rehab following her awakening, I'd offered her the second bedroom in the house. The offer shocked me just as much as it shocked everyone else. I honestly couldn't believe I'd been bold enough to make the offer. I was even more shocked when she accepted. But she made for such a quiet housemate that I'd taken to following her around during her days off.

The teens trickled out of the ride gates, gathering around Sans and Frisk.

"Roll call time!" Frisk yelled over the crowd, eyes red green and a hint of yellow. "When Sans is done checking that everyone is here, we'll hit the tram, and get you kids back home."

"Oh come on!" One teen complained and received a stern, red orange look for the trouble. Roll call and loading the tram went quickly. The teens clamored around the light gray interior of the tram car, talking over one another about the trip, a few hanging on Frisk, asking her questions about what it was like to ride roller coasters as a human.

Frisk's data pad beeped and she pulled it out of it's case, eyes yellow blue. "Frisk here."

Prince Asriel's voice came through loud and clear. "I apologize for bothering you on your day off, Frisk, but our exploratory group found the remains of a human FTL ship. The registry lists it as the Osiris."

Frisk gripped the data pad tightly, lips pursed tightly shut, eyes yellow red. The tram car quieted instantly.

"You're almost finished with the chaperoning trip, correct? Once you've dropped the kids off, come over to Exploration. I'll have some dinner ready for you."

Frisk nodded, remembered that the goat prince could not see it, and answered. "See you soon."

The kids were suddenly surrounding her.

"The Osiris is your ship, right?"

"Of course it is! That's why we call her Osiris!"

"Do you think there are other humans on it?"

"What do you think happened?"

"Hey, Osiris? You won't leave us, right?"

The last question came from MK and she touched his shoulder reassuringly, eyes yellow green. "The Osiris launched over a thousand years ago. It's a miracle that I survived cryo-stasis for that long. If the ship was in working order, His Royal Highness would have mentioned it." She looked around. "On our next trip, I promise to tell you all I'm allowed, okay?"

The promise was greeted by nods and a few demands for pinky swears, which Frisk gladly gave.

The tram pulled into the station outside the entrance of the Starfall Biome. Parents waited on the station platform for their children and when each child had been matched to a guardian, Frisk and Sans returned to the tram.

"*you okay, kid?"

Frisk took a deep breath, eyes white pink. "You know I'm older than you, right?"

Sans smile widened. "*you're my frisk. that makes you my kiddo. and i'm going to call you that for the rest of your life. the question stands by the way."

Frisk sighed. "I don't know. I guess I'll just have to see the ship and find out." She frowned. "I'm worried that there are living humans still in stasis and I'm worried about what will happen if they don't wake up."

"*well, at least you'll have asriel with you, right?"

Her shoulders fell and her head drooped. "I..." She smiled then, eyes pink green. "Yeah. I will."

Sans patted her shoulder. "*i know the rumors that run around the ship about you two. and i know that they aren't true. but i am saying this. you spent fifteen years dodging him before cross showed up and after reset you spent another twenty going through the same routine. i know you love him, and he'll wait for you until your last breath. so give it a rest. stop worrying about the politics of it and let him make you his family."

Frisk sighed and pulled the band holding her braid in place. Untangling the braid, she ran her fingers through her red gold hair, a color chosen and maintained by my cousin.

Sans elbowed her before putting his boney arm around her. "*let me know if you need me, okay? i don't need a suit so i can just short cut to were ever you are."

She smiled, eyes blue purple. "Will do."

The tram stopped at the way station to Exploration and Frisk disembarked with a wave. The green and blue walkway was abuzz with activity. Exploration teams ran back and forth, preparing to leave for the derelict ship. The Exploration suits were a break through in textiles. While suits were made to fit monsters as they needed them, the suits themselves were all made of a super thin, super strong, and incredibly warm fabric copied from the suit Frisk had been wearing when she was found. The suits allowed for full range of motion and did not require special training to wear. The fabric could be made in any color and so suit colors were quickly codified: bright neon orange and yellow striped for children, glaring red for construction, bright green for recreation, dark blue for security, white for exploration, and purple for the royal family and their entourage.

Frisk owned three suits: green, white, and purple. She picked her way through the crowd, only to be mobbed by teams with questions.

Rajur, the massive, red maned lion monster who managed the entire Exploration division caught her arm and pulled her away from the crowd. "Osiris will brief team leaders on what she remembers after we've finished our preparations. Team leaders have five minutes to conference." He led her away to Exploration's white and blue offices.

"Thanks for the help, Rajur."

"Don't thank me yet. Your ship is far more intact than we originally thought. The power core is still running the bridge and forward ark compartments."

Frisk frowned and nodded. "You know you can call me Frisk."

A smile twitched the corner of his mouth. "I, like most monsters, find calling you Osiris fitting. You are a mythical being come back from the dead and had to have a part or two replaced." The smile finally erupted.

Frisk's head fell back with her laugh. "Oh man! You know not to make those kind of jokes with anyone else right?"

"Well, I do like my job, so yes." He opened the door to meeting room three. "His Majesty awaits."

Frisk, eyes blue orange, entered the meeting room to find Asriel waiting as Rajur closed the door behind her. He was already in his purple exploration suit, the Delta Rune in gold across the chest. A take out bag from Grillby's sat on the conference table. Before she could sit down to eat, the goat prince pulled her close, turning her face up toward his.

"Do you feel all right?"

"I don't know how I'm supposed to feel." She looked away, eyes a rainbow wash. "I had family and friends on that ship and we were spaced out all over the ark. I've long lived with the fact that everyone I knew and loved is dead, but I don't know how I'm going to react if I see their bodies." She sighed, eyes closed for a moment before forcing a weak smile. "What did you get me?"

"Your usual. Cheeseburger and fries with copious amounts of ketchup." He sighed. "I will never understand the ketchup thing."

"Blame it on Sans. He drinks the stuff." Frisk turned back to the table only to have Asriel spin her back around and hold her close. She relaxed against his chest before looking up at him. "We aren't alone and I need to eat before the team leaders get here in..." She looked at the clock on the wall. "Two minutes."

Asriel sighed. "I know. I know."

Frisk was still eating when the team leaders came in and took seats. Rajur pulled up a glowing green hologram of the ship. It was easily a mile long in length and relatively thin. The twin engines were set in the middle of the ship, and a section of the aft behind the engines was distinctly missing.

Frisk wiped her mouth on a napkin and stood, eyes red brown. "The FTL ship Osiris is an ark ship. It launched from Earth twelve hundred years ago heading for an Earth like planet in the Tau Ceti system. The crew of the ship is completely robotic and run by A.I. fragments. All humans aboard the ship were put into cryo-stasis just after launch. The mission, named Project Osiris, was to complete the journey to the chosen planet where the robotic crew would assess habitability before destroying all microbes, replacing the lost microbes with ones brought from Earth, and terraforming the planet while the humans on board awoke and adjusted to their new life."

"Tau Ceti? That means the ship is completely in the wrong place," one of the team leaders interjected.

Frisk nodded, eyes blue purple. She stood, pointing to a missing section of the ship. "This section of the ship is where my pod was. However, stasis pods lined the entire interior of ship with the exception of the forward bridge." She pointed to the intact front. "That said, it is very unlikely that any of the humans in the intact part of the ship have survived. The parts of the ship that are missing includes the medical facilities. So any human in stasis that required medical attention was completely out of luck."

"You said the ship is run by A.I. fragments. What exactly does that mean?" Rajur asked.

"During my time on Earth, we had strong fears of rampancy after an A.I. running a nuclear power plant intentionally caused a meltdown. So all artificial intelligence programs were split into fragments. Each fragment had enough power to do it's job but never be able to break programming. Project Osiris was fitted with several fragments that operated independently of the rest."

"Any ideas on how the ship ended up in this condition?" Asriel asked.

Frisk shook her head, eyes yellow orange. "We'll have a better idea of what happened when we're on board."

"Are all teams ready?" Rajur asked.

Gynnyr, the Beta team's rabbit monster leader winked at Frisk. "With the exception of Delta's team leader needing to suit up, we're all ready."

Rajur nodded. "Let's go."

Six exploration teams headed to the derelict ship in six different shuttles. Each shuttle cable docked and everyone space walked to the Osiris via the cables, and splitting up in zero gravity to explore their assigned parts of the ship. Asriel and the rest of the Delta team followed Frisk as she swam carefully through the corridor, surrounded by blacked out screens and an eerie, pale green light. A deep silence entombed us all. I fit myself into the circuitry of Frisk's suit so I could at least hear her breath. To have some sound.

The Delta team floated onto the bridge and immediately found their feet as they stepped into artificial gravity. Robots roamed the bridge, tapping at blank screens and damaged control panels as if they were still functional. Frisk floated around, inspecting the damage while Asriel and two of the Delta team techs started pulling the ship's log.

After an hour, Rajur's voice came over the comm. "All team leaders. Give me your initial reports on the open channel."

"Alpha team reporting from engineering. The magnetic propulsion drive and the FTL drive are completely disconnected from the ship, but are operable. It looks like the A.I. fragment that control the engines has completely broken down. There's power, but no response. Over."

"Beta team reporting from the aft wreckage. The missing piece of the ship appears to have been blown off from the inside. Exterior damage is from debris flying away from the ship, not from external impact. There are a few stasis pods here, but none of them are active." The team leader was silent for a moment before continuing. "The humans all look so different from one another..."

"Beta?" Rajur prompted.

"Sorry, sir. Over."

"Gamma team reporting from robotics. It looks like the entire bay is broken down, like someone shut off the system and left all the helper robots to gather dust. Artificial gravity is working in this area. It would take a couple weeks, but we could get it up and running again. Over."

Frisk's voice came over the comm. "Delta team reporting from the bridge. The bridge has full power and is mostly operational. Artificial gravity is operational in this area. Some of the bridge terminals have been damaged like someone pounded on them with a blunt object. The robots on the bridge are carrying on bridge duties as if the ship were still completely operational and on mission. It looks like they don't even notice they're missing part of the ship and that the engines are off line. The team is pulling the ship's logs as we speak. Over."

"Epsilon team reporting from the port side pod bay. There is no power to this part of the ship at all and the individual power nodes for all the pods here are long dead. There are no survivors on this side. Over."

"Zeta team reporting from the starboard side pod bay!" Zeta's leader, a chimera monster named Larris, could barely contain his excitement. "The pods here are fully functional! We have confirmed life signs for at least fifteen pods!" Larris suddenly choked. "What the...?"

"Zeta?" Rajur prompted.

"Osiris? You still on the line?" Larris asked.

Frisk frowned. "I'm here."

"You're also in the pod in front of me."

Frisk's hands balled into fists, eyes squeezed shut in a desperate attempt to keep from crying.

Asriel took her hands in his. "Are there life signs?"

"Yeah. What am I looking at?"

Frisk took a deep breath and opened red eyes. "My twin sister."

Rajur's voice took over the comm. "Epsilon team will report to Zeta's location. Both teams will ascertain how many survivors we have on our hands. All other teams will report back to the ship. Medical teams Theta and Iota are to suit up and begin operations to move the pods with survivors to the Delta's quarantine lab. Any questions?"

"None, sir!"

"None."

"None."

"None."

"None, sir."

"May I see my sister's pod before Delta team disembarks?"

"I've no objections," Rajur answered.

The Delta team quickly finished pulling the logs, rushing down the brightly lit starboard side of the ship for Zeta team's location. Larris was waiting, vibrating ecstatically with excitement. He pointed to the pod in question and Frisk floated up to it, looking through the pod window. Her breath caught in her chest, fingers gently brushing window. She floated there, staring with eyes a wash of rainbows.

I felt a tug. A ghostly one. I looked around and saw hundreds of ghosts surrounding me. They were all speaking urgently, but the vacuum killed the sound. All of them were desperately trying to tell me something. I shrank back only to have one of them grab me and pull me through the ship. I struggled against the pull trying to get back to Frisk. The ghost pulled me through the ship's haul, across the vacuum, and into Delta team's shuttle.

"Don't open that pod!"

I floated back from the ghost. "Why?"

"She saved as much of the ship as she could, but she did something strange. Don't open the pod."

"But Frisk..."

The ghost suddenly looked conflicted, eyes casting about the room, before resolve came back. "Don't open the pod." The ghost turned to leave.

"Wait! Um..." I moved toward the ghost and then back again. "Come back to the Delta! There are others there."

A deep sadness came over the ghost. "I..." She looked out a bay window on the shuttle at the derelict Osiris. The medical teams were cable docking with the ship. "We can't. We're all still trying to get to Tau Ceti."

Tears filled my eyes and leaked down my shroud. "Your persistence is attached to your mission. Oh..."

The ghost faded away as the Delta team came on board the shuttle. Frisk sat next to Asriel, head down, hands in her lap. Asriel put an arm around her shoulders, holding her close as the shuttle returned home.

Frisk sat in Exploration's meeting room one, looking over the ship's logs with Rajur, cups of golden flower tea steaming in front of them.

"The logs record an issue with the ship's A.I. fragments, resulting in an explosion on the port side aft. After the crisis was contained, the ship's course was altered. It looks like someone was attempting to find pods jettisoned in the explosion. The robotic personal were given explicit instructions to find a specific pod, serial number A98642-SOPV." Rajur looked at Frisk, honestly confused. "Why does that sound familiar?"

"Because that was the serial number on my pod." Frisk frowned. "Why change course? Why go after my pod specifically? I was one person out of hundreds. It's far more logical to repair the damage and continue on the mission. Why would the ship zero in on me?"

"Would you serve some special function on arrival?"

Frisk shook her head, eyes green black. "I was part of the initial security team and my engineering skills only came into play after we were planet side. The people who would need to wake up first, the ship's technical operators, were all housed on the starboard side, close to the bridge." She looked at the log again. "Why did the A.I. fragments act up? They shouldn't have been able too."

The terminal to the right lit up and a glowing star appeared. The voice of Delta, the ship's A.I. came over the speakers. "If I may, I believe I can shed some light on this subject." The terminal screen changed to a standard A.I. model. "An A.I. such as myself can be deconstructed into component parts. Each of these parts, or fragments, can reassemble into a complete whole." The model on the terminal split apart, illustrating the process.

"But on the Osiris, none of the A.I. fragments where part of a whole. Each was distinct. If they had been forcibly combined, the resulting A.I. would have gone into rampancy almost immediately." The fragment model changed to indicate multiple unconnected fragments combining into a mess of code. "I postulate that the Osiris's A.I. fragments combined and the result was the ship malfunction."

The screen changed again, showing a model of the ship with a read out around the damaged port side. "However, I believe that this was an act of sabotage. There is no reason for this section of the ship to have been involved in an interior explosion unless explosives had already been planted on board."

Frisk and Rajur both jumped out of their seats.

"Pull the teams!"

Rajur tapped his comm. "All teams are to pull out of the Osiris now!"

Four voices came over at the same time. "Yes, sir!"

"Sigma team will suit up and head to quarantine to sweep the recovered pods for explosives."

"Oh fuck," Saresh, the dragon monster leader of team Theta, slipped. "Should we leave the last two pods, sir?"

"Bring them with you. Iota's shuttle can sweep them before they get to quarantine."

Frisk looked at the terminal, eyes green orange. "Delta? If the Osiris exploded now, how badly would you be damaged?"

"Several biomes would be damaged, but not catastrophically so. There would be significant loss of life."

Frisk hopped in place for a moment, eyes blue green. It was something she did when she had to make a decision that could be extremely problematic. "Call Asriel and let him know the situation. Tell him I suggest temp evac of the affected biomes until you can move us a safe distance away from the wreckage."

"As you wish." The terminal went dark.

Frisk went for the door. "I'm heading to observation over quarantine."

Rajur grabbed her arm, forcing her to stop. "I know your stake in this is deeply personal. But I'm not going to let you near quarantine until we know for sure that the pods are not bombed and that the humans inside are not carrying anything deadly to the inhabitants of the ship." Rajur sighed and let go of her arm. "His Majesty is very likely to call you directly to him to help with evac. Wait on that."

Frisk nodded, eyes pink yellow, and did not have to wait long before her data pad beeped with Asriel's summons. The evacuations went smoothly though you wouldn't think it from the way the media presented the it on the big screens in Asriel's New Home offices. I felt bad for Mettaton. His media empire had been fighting him on how news was covered, and often spun the story to make the lone human on our ship responsible for every terrible thing that happened. Too many monsters had forgotten that we owed Frisk our existence. That her being here, beyond the anti-bodies in her blood, made our lives collectively easier.

She'd fallen asleep on the couch in Asriel's office part way through New Home's artificial night. Undyne draped a blanket over her.

"Do you want me to put her in your bed?"

Asriel raised an eyebrow, but did not look up. "She'll kill me if she wakes up there."

Undyne smirked. "She worries too much." Her smile turned big. "I aught to dump her in there anyway!" She frowned, looking down at Frisk. "Twenty years. But's really been more than that, hasn't it?"

Asriel looked up from his desk. "You remember?"

"Only very vaguely. I just kept thinking that I already knew Frisk when we first met. That she was my friend. I asked Sans about it and he said the feeling wasn't off base. That I did know her."

"Did he tell you want happened?"

Undyne shook her head. "Only that someone kidnapped her and doing so did something to everyone here."

Asriel put his data pad down. "A human from another reality kidnapped her and ripped her soul out, imprisoning it in a piece of pure anti-matter. When he did that, it destroyed our reality. Our reality was recreated when her soul was released." He looked at Frisk. "She remembers everything that happened, but the information as I know it has only come to me from what I could tease out of Sans."

"God damn. We all really do depend on Frisk for our survival." Undyne sat down across from her sovereign. "So what happens when she dies?"

"Sans says that Frisk has some ability to cheat death. That it's not a coincidence that Delta chose the star pattern it uses for an avatar and that it does something for her. But at the end of life, once she's attained old age, she will have the choice to go back to the moment she woke up on the Delta and live her life all over again, or choose to let her soul remain."

Undyne looked over her shoulder at Frisk's sleeping face. "What do you think she'll do?"

"She's already offered me her soul."

Undyne slammed her hands on the desk as she stood. "In your bed she goes!"

Asriel rolled his eyes.

"You should get some sleep too, Az."

Asriel shooed Undyne from the office, locking the door behind her. He knelt next to the couch, pushing Frisk's hair away from her face before lifting her and sitting down with her body curled against his chest. The next morning I found them at the observation windows in the quarantine lab.

Saresh briefed them. "The pods have been swept and Dr. Alphys team has finished scrubbing the patients."

Asriel watched the medical teams swarming the pods. "How many survivors?"

"We found twenty five survivors. Three died when we disconnected their pods from the ship. Two died in transit to the Delta." Saresh eyes went wide and she held up her hands in front of her, waving them wildly at Frisk. "I swear that the deaths weren't intentional!"

Frisk took the dragon monster's hands in hers, eyes purple yellow. "It's okay. I believe you." She gave Saresh a patient smile. "I'm sure that we'll lose more from the shock of coming out of cryo-sleep. It was something we were all prepared for when we went under."

Saresh nodded. "The patients are all in really good condition. The majority will not need the robust physical therapy you did because their pods are in working order."

"And my sister?"

"She seems to be fine..."

Frisk waited, eyes yellow orange.

"It's like she's been in and out of the stasis. She shows aging consistent with having woken up and gone back to sleep several times. In fact, another female does as well."

Frisk and Asriel looked at each other.

"Do you have any idea what that means?" Asriel asked.

Frisk shook her head. "My best guess is that she was brought out of stasis to help the ship. She is one of the techs. If we weren't so worried about the Osiris going up, we might have seen signs that other technical crew had been up and about as well."

Saresh's data pad beeped. "It looks like Alphys wants you to be there when she wakes the first patient."

Frisk nodded and headed down the stairs, eyes black purple. Inside the medical bay, Alphys stood at the bed side of a young man. He had brown hair and a strong, square jaw.

"What do you need me to do, Alph?"

Alphys smiled sheepishly. "I'm sorry! I know you're probably super anxious to see your sister, but I want to make sure that the process is working properly before we wake her. This patient is in the best condition and I can wake him without too much fear."

Frisk nodded. "It's okay." She moved to the opposite side of the bed and sat on the edge, her hand coming to rest on the patient's. "Do you want me to help him transition?"

Alphys nodded. "Yes. And thank you."

Medical team monsters gathered at the window and my cousins, with the exception of Mettaton, floated into the room to watch as Alphys injected the man with a chemical concoction meant to wake him.

Everyone held their breathe as the seconds ticked past.

An audible sigh was heard from the group as the patient's fingers twitched and his brown eyes fluttered. Alphys took a step back as the patient's eyes opened. He looked around, unfocused for a moment, before his eyes landed on Frisk.

"Did we reach Tau Ceti?" his voice croaked.

Frisk shook her head, eyes pink purple. "No. The Osiris is so off course and so damaged, it can't complete it's mission."

His face fell, eyes casting from side to side down the bed before looking up at Frisk. "So now what? Am I back on Earth? Do we try again?"

Frisk squeezed his hand. "You are on the colony ship Delta and we are a several million light years from Earth. What is your name?"

"Ellis Ward. Who are you?"

"Frisk Provost."

"Provost? That sounds familiar."

"My sister Chara is part of technical."

Ellis nodded. "Chara's sister, huh? You look a lot older than her." He adjusted a bit before peeking over at Alphys as best he could. "Are you an alien?"

Alphys laughed sheepishly.

He looked at Frisk. "What's so funny?"

"I asked her the same thing when I woke up."

"I'm not an alien. I'm... well... my ancestors are from Earth. We've been on this ship so long, humans are pretty much mythical beings for us."

"How long have you been out here?"

"Two thousand years."

Ellis looked sharply at Frisk. "How long have I been in stasis?"

"Twelve hundred years."

His jaw dropped. "That would mean that this ship launched centuries before ours! How is that possible?"

Frisk looked at Alphys and the rest of the medical team. "My best guess is that Earth wanted to bury this ship's existence after launch." She pursed her lips together, eyes blue brown. "Ellis. Only twenty one people have made it off the Osiris. You're only the second one to wake up. The medical team is still assessing the others before waking them from stasis."

"What happened to the ship?!"

Alphys shook her head. "We aren't sure yet." Alphys motioned a member of the team over, a chimera type. "This is Bryce. He'll be taking care of you while we get you up and acclimated to life on the Delta. When everyone from the Osiris is awake, we'll give you the best information we can on your mission and what went wrong. The other nineteen from the ship are in the rooms in this ward. Feel free to ask any questions you have, but please understand that we have very little information right now. It's a miracle that we even found you, let alone you being alive. So take it easy and don't stress yourself too much."

Ellis nodded and sank back into the pillows. "Is your sister among the survivors?"

Frisk nodded. "Yeah. Did you have any family on the Osiris?"

He shook his head. "No. I just... I wanted to see the stars."

Frisk patted his hand. "We all did. We still get too." She stood and headed with Alphys out the door.

Sans sat on the nurses' station desk, bare boney feet swinging. "Taking all bets! How many of our new comers will ask if Alphys is an alien?"

Alphys huffed while several of the med staff laughed.

"Lazy bones! Get off that desk!"

Sans jumped down. "*how's it going?"

Alphys crossed her arms over her chest. "Slowly."

"Alphys! Patient two just woke up!"

Frisk and Alphys ran for the room. A woman with black hair and green eyes looked wildly around the room, thrashing in the bed. Frisk rushed around the staff to get to the head of the bed. Frisk took the woman's right hand in hers, holding it tightly, while placing her other hand on the woman's forehead.

"Look at me! I'm human too! It's okay. You're safe. You're in a medical lab on the colony ship Delta."

The woman stared at Frisk. "Eyes."

Frisk blinked. "Eyes? My eyes? They were damaged in stasis. These are implants."

The woman laid back, calming. "Aliens?"

Alphys face palmed and sighed.

Frisk smiled. "No, but it's a long story to explain why they aren't. What's your name?"

"Riley Wood." She frowned and recognition dawned in her eyes. "You're Chara Provost!" She suddenly grabbed Frisk's blouse and pulled her forward. "What did you do?!"

Frisk blinked at her. "I'm Frisk, Chara's sister. What did Chara do?"

Riley let go of Frisk and looked away. "You said I'm on a ship called Delta. Where is that ship in relation to Earth?"

"The complete opposite of Tau Ceti."

Riley shook her head. "Tau Ceti was never the destination."

"What?! Then where the hell were we going?!"

Riley shook her head. "Doesn't matter now."

Frisk's voice changed, the tone deeply threatening in a way I'd never heard before. "Yes it does."

Everyone in the room shivered and Riley shrank back. "No where. The ship was a front to get rid of large numbers of politically problematic people."

Frisk turned and left the room. She leaned over the nurses' station, putting her head down on her arms on the desk. One of the nurses reached over and patted her head with a clawed hand.

Sans lifted one of her arms to look at her face. "*kid?"

She didn't move.

Sans sighed. "*so... going by your reaction, what she said makes sense, huh?"

"The reason Cross wanted me to begin with is what made me politically problematic." She groaned. "Maybe that should be my middle name. 'Politically Problematic.'"

The nurse's clawed hand grabbed Frisk's hair and lifted her head. "Do not, _ever,_ let the way those media assholes spin the news make you think like that. Every group of people has their idiots. Don't let those idiots make you think badly of yourself or the rest of us." She let go of Frisk's hair. "The Delta would be empty but for the ghosts if you hadn't shown up. And His Majesty has softened quite a bit since you came into his life. That by itself has been its own boon." She patted Frisk's shoulder. "Alphys is going to wake your sister next. She's in room four."

Frisk nodded. "Thank you."

The nurse smiled around her yellow beak and shooed Frisk along. She took a deep breath and walked into room four. A woman with Frisk's triangular face, and pointy little chin, lay in the bed. Short brown hair framed her face. Frisk took her sister's hand and waited while the chemical stimulant worked its way through the blood stream.

The seconds ticked on.

The seconds became minutes.

The minutes became too many.

Alphys checked Chara's vitals before scanning her. "Her heart rate is still slow. It'll take a while before her cortisol levels rise." Alphys patted Frisk's shoulder. "Help me with the rest and we'll come back later."

Frisk nodded with a soft smile. As the morning wore on, eight more of the humans passed away, their hearts or other essential organs failing in the process of awakening, prompting Asriel to leave his duties to handle the issue of the persistent human souls. He'd changed clothes and was back in his usual purple shirt and black pants, carelessly shoved into his boots, with a black utility vest stuffed with the various tools he used throughout the day. Gathering the souls together, he sent the monsters away, calling me and my cousins into Alphys' office. I remembered this from when I died. It wouldn't take long. The souls, lacking vessels, would start to fade and their shroud would appear. And the Blook family would have eight new members.

The oldest of us explained what was happening while Asriel waited, the royal family having long kept our secret. That Frisk had not been the first human on the ship. Though to be fair, none of us had lived long enough for news to have traveled about the first six of us in the early days of the Delta's journey. Frisk had been, until now, the only one who had survived.

My cousins drew the new ghosts away while I followed Asriel back into the quarantine ward. Of the twelve from the ship who remained, Chara had yet to awaken. The other eleven were adjusting with various degrees of success to the monsters caring for them. Two of them out right refused care from anything other than medical robots. The one named Riley continued to be closed mouth about the mission of the Osiris.

Asriel pulled Frisk away for lunch. "It's not fair for you to be working so hard on your day off. Come on. I'll treat you to lunch while we wait on your sister." He led her to the cafe in the medical bay attached to Exploration.

Frisk chewed her sandwich thoughtfully, eyes green purple. She looked so tired, mentally drained if not physically so.

"It won't take much longer. I've already taken you off duty for the next week."

She smiled at the goat prince. "Thank you."

"You never take time off. Even your weekends are spent working in some capacity. So I hope, with your sister being here, it means that you'll take advantage of the copious amounts of leave you've acquired."

"But taking time off means a day not seeing you!" Undyne barked, putting her arm around Frisk's shoulders. My housemate blushed a little, partially hiding her face behind her sandwich.

Before anyone could respond, a bright shining star erupted on the table between Frisk and Asriel.

"I apologize for interrupting your meal, but two important issues have arisen. The human designated Riley Woods and Frisk's sister have both disappeared from the quarantine lab. The second issue is that someone has accessed one of my primary terminals in an attempt to hack me. I have disconnected from the terminal, but I am running a program that will give the hacker the impression that they are getting somewhere, hence keeping them occupied until they can be apprehended."

"Which terminal?" Undyne asked.

"The one in Exploration."

"On it." Undyne rushed away, pulling out her datapad as she left.

"Can you track our missing humans?" Asriel asked as he stood.

"Riley Woods is attempting to sneak into Exploration's secondary shuttle bay. She is being assisted by a member of the medical team and a member of the media. Chara Provost appears to be following her."

"Send the tracking information to our data pads." He took Frisk's hand as she stood. "Let's go." They hurried back into Exploration.

"I would like it noted, Az, that you should send a security team instead of going yourself!" Frisk growled.

A devious smile curled the goat prince's lips. "Oh Frisk! You never let me have any fun!" He pulled her down a back passage toward the bay. "I've already notified Exploration's security. They'll get to the shuttle bay before us."

They came up on the catwalk over where Riley Woods and the two monsters were hidden. The monsters seemed to be supporting Riley between them, her legs not the least bit ready for walking after her long sleep. Frisk and Asriel knelt silently, listening carefully to the conversation.

"Our terminal hacker was caught, but said before Undyne grabbed her that there were no files in the Osiris' bridge logs. You said that ship would have more information."

Riley nodded. "If the pod of the person you call Osiris was in the missing part of the ship, then records on who they are would be contained in the passenger files. Though I still don't understand why it's an issue."

"Osiris has unprecedented access to the royal family and yet the public knows very little about them. We want to know the truth. We want to know who Osiris is."

I looked at Frisk. She'd been with us for twenty years. How could anyone not know who she was?

I could see Chara sneaking up from behind, ready to pounce. It seems that the long sleep did not have the same effect on her as it had Riley. She waited until one monster dashed out onto the balcony and down the side stairs to the shuttles before pouncing on Riley, ripping her from the arms of the monster supporting her.

Chara tore at Riley's hair and clothing, scrapping more than actually fighting. The media monster stood there, too shocked to move. Asriel and Frisk dropped down from the catwalk. The goat prince grabbed the monster while Frisk pulled her sister off of Riley.

Chara screamed, flipping Frisk over and sending her down the stairs with a crash.

"Frisk!" Asriel quickly knocked out the monster in his grasp and dashed for the stairs.

"Frisk?" Chara blinked rapidly and ran to the balcony. Riley grabbed her ankle, sending Chara over the railing of the balcony.

Frisk saw her sister fall and rolled across the floor to catch her. Chara landed on her sister with an audible crack. Frisk coughed, blood staining her lips.

Chara pushed herself up with a groan and looked down. "Frisk? Oh God. Tell me I'm not hallucinating!"

Frisk smiled weakly. "Hey, Sis."

Chara hugged her suddenly, only to get a pained whimper in response. Chara sat up quickly. "Oh no!"

"Let me," Asriel said and helped Frisk to her feet. She leaned heavily against him, gripping his belt.

The security team grabbed the monster attempting to hijack a shuttle. "No! No! I will not stand for this!" He broke free of the officer holding him and ran for Frisk.

Asriel stepped in front of her and back handed monster, sending him to the floor. His eyes glowed a deep and threatening violet and I cringed away. "I have had enough of this rumor mongering! This obsession! It ends here!"

The monster cowered away from his prince, hiding his face behind his paws with a soft whimpering. Security picked him up and dragged him away. Medical staff helped Riley from the floor and into a wheel chair while Asriel picked Frisk up, cradling her against his chest.

Chara grabbed Frisk's hand in her left, touching Frisk's face with her left. Frisk smiled and closed her eyes. Chara panicked. "No! No! Frisk!"

"She'll be all right," Asriel said. "Follow me." He turned and headed for the quarantine lab. "Delta? Please ask my mother to send a slice of her butterscotch-cinnamon pie to the Q-Lab."

"Yes, Your Majesty."

Chara followed silently, uncaring of the monsters around her, focused completely on her sister. In the lab, Alphys directed her prince to lay Frisk in an open bed.

Once Frisk's care was under way, he turned to the medical staff caring for Riley. "Put her in Q-Lab office." He looked down at Chara. "Follow them."

"My sister..."

"Will be fine in a few minutes. You have answers to some very important questions and I will have them." He looked up at the nurses' station. "Sans. Get Undyne and get in there."

I looked between Frisk and Asriel for a moment before following the prince. Once Sans, Undyne, and Alphys were in the office, the door closed and locked.

Asriel leaned against the desk. "What happened on the Osiris?"

"That's classified," Riley answered.

"It was classified twelve hundred years ago. Start talking before I throw you out an air lock."

"Twelve hundred years..." Riley's face fell and she stared at the floor.

Chara jumped in. "The Osiris, as far as I knew at the start, was an ark ship destined for Tau Ceti. As one of the ship's techs, I was awakened out of cryo-stasis with explicit orders to combine the A.I. fragments into one A.I. I was told the fragments were all from the same A.I. They weren't. The A.I. went into rampancy." She glared at Riley. "Which was apparently the plan."

Chara gripped the armrests of her chair, still glaring at Riley. "When the rest of the ship's systems detected rampancy, it detonated explosives set along the entire back half of the Osiris. I was able to disconnect the explosives on the starboard side, but the port side was completely gone."

Riley found her anger and rounded on Chara. "And then YOU set the ship on a course into nothingness!" Riley yelled. "Why did you think the engines were in the middle of the ship? It was so the detonation of the back half wouldn't lose the FTL drive! I could have gone back home to my family!"

Chara's red eyes went hard and cold as ice. "My family was in the pods in the back half of the ship!"

Riley's eyes went wide. "You didn't send us into nothingness. You sent the ship after your sister's pod."

"*speaking of said sister. either of you want to enlighten us as to why frisk was considered 'politically problematic?'"

"She's a member of Project Viper," Chara said. "I don't know if that means anything to any of you. But it was the reason she chose to go on the Osiris. To get away from it."

"Your sister's a war hero?" Riley blinked rapidly. "I don't understand. How was that..." She looked around at the monsters. "None of you are surprised about this information."

Asriel shrugged. "There are some things Frisk won't talk about, though I'm willing to bet at this point it's because the memories have faded. But we are aware of her military service on Earth."

"How long has Frisk been here?" Chara asked.

"Twenty years."

There was a knock at the door and Asriel nodded for Sans to unlock it. Queen Toriel poked her head in the door. "Frisk is up and she would like to see her sister."

Asriel nodded and stood. "Alphys, take Riley Woods back to her room. Rajur and I will handle integrating the humans into monster society later. Chara Provost, you are welcome to go see your sister, but you will remain in Q-Lab until you have been cleared to leave it." His eyes glowed softly. "Is that understood?"

Chara nodded and stood. Toriel gave her a smile and offered her a hand. "This way, child."

I followed the pair to the room Frisk was sitting in, finishing a piece of pie, eyes green blue. My cousin Mettaton fussed over her, apologizing profusely for the lack of manners among his media staff.

Chara rushed past my cousin to Frisk, taking her head in both hands and kissing her all over her face.

Mettaton sighed, smiling at the sight. "Well, before I leave you to your happy reunion, have you seen my cousin? I've been trying to ring him all day."

"Oh yeah. He's been following me all weekend."

Oh...


	3. Ep 3 - Final Exam

Core Issues: Season Three  
by Nicolle

Disclaimer: Undertale belongs to Toby Fox. Pokemon belongs to Game Freak. Portal belongs to Valve. G!Sans (who is taking a break from being our narrator) and G!Paps belong to Borurou. Fase is from Technotale. Underfell is a community project. Shipworks belongs to me. This story is copyright to me.

Special Disclaimer: While I do not use the specifics of the actual Portale, Omegasm7890 gets the credit for coming up with the idea. The Horrortale I am using here belongs to s-h-o-r-t-y and horror-bear.

1\. This thing went through so many drafts I wasn't sure it would make it to episode three but need to be pushed back. But the characters wouldn't shut up in my head and I was able to push through.

2\. Rated T for language, sexual themes/jokes, and violence.

Ep. 3 - Final Exam  
(Fell Chara is our narrator.)

Frisk slept against Asriel's chest while he read a book. We sat under an oak tree in the Seraph Foundation's well kept gardens, enjoying a few moments when we didn't have to be on guard. Az's hand gently petted Frisk's purple hair, while I rested against the tree with my hands behind my head. The day was bright, the clouds were big and puffy, and before I could drift off to sleep my 'Fell-Sense' tingled.

I caught sight of Frisk, the one with the big exemplar named Crow, heading right for us. I smiled as I sat up. "Here comes trouble."

She stuck her tongue out at me as she sat next to me, refusing to give up that last piece of immaturity despite being twenty years old. "Check it out! I nicked Frisk's Pokeballs!" She held out three red and white balls, each marked with a little sticker.

I raised an eyebrow at her. "And I'm pretty sure I remember her saying that her Pokemon are dangerous."

"Just the one!" She elbowed me. "Don't you want to see real Pokemon?"

I leaned back against the tree, arms behind my head. "I saw Bone's Houndoom, so I'm good."

Frisk reached out to shove me and one of the balls rolled away from her, landing on the button. A bright light erupted and a huge snake with long fangs appeared. I jumped to my feet, putting her behind me.

The Seviper, Apophis, hissed and reared up in front of me.

"Poison types are weak to psychic and ground attacks," my Frisk said, sleepily.

"Got it." I grabbed a chunk of dirt from the garden and flung it in the Seviper's eyes.

It hissed and shook it's head, trying to clear the dust. I grabbed the Pokeball with the ankh sticker on it from Frisk's hand. I hit the button and tossed it. A Lucario appeared in a burst of light in front of me.

"Anubis! I'm sorry I'm not your trainer, but I could really use a hand against Apophis here."

Anubis nodded and fell into stance. "Lucario!"

Apophis launched at Anubis, fangs out.

"Anubis! Dig!"

The Lucario dived, digging into the ground quickly. Apophis landed face first in the dirt and came up looking around rapidly. Anubis came up underneath him, hitting hard and fast. The Seviper hit the ground, completely knocked out.

"Yes!"

Anubis turned with a pleased smile on it's snout. "Lucario!"

We high fived. "Thanks for the help."

Apophis shook it's head and rose, slithering up to me. It ducked it's head.

"He's looking for pets."

I turned and saw Bone's Frisk standing there in one of her lacy, layered dresses. Baby Sophia, all dark haired and blue eyed, stood next to her, sucking away at a juice pouch. Though 'baby' wasn't a fair assessment. She would turn four soon. She spied my Frisk and ran for her, cuddling up between her and Az while babbling excitedly.

Sophia's one year old brother, Brandon, clung to his mother's chest, despite the sling she wore nestling him tightly. He had the same coloring as his sister, dark hair and blue eyes. Ravie had been seriously dismayed that neither of his younger siblings were skeletons like him. On the other hand, I had seen Bones with skin on during a mission, and damn if his children didn't look exactly like him.

I turned back to Apophis and rubbed his head.

"It figures that the Pokemon that doesn't like anyone would like you," Asriel said as he played peek a boo with Sophia.

"Bite me, Az."

He smiled and 'chomped' at me, lips drawn back from his sharp teeth.

Frisk huffed and threw a punch at my shoulder, dark hair swinging. "You jerk! You've seen lots of Pokemon, haven't you?!"

I ducked her fist. "Yeah. And I've trained with these so I know what they can do."

She glared and slammed into me with her shoulder, knocking us both to the ground.

"Ow."

She gasped and sat up quick. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

I rubbed my arm as I sat up. "For someone so quick to the punch, you're also quick to the remorse."

Frisk frowned. "Sorry."

"I'm all right." I stood and offered her my hand.

Bone's Frisk picked two large blue fruits from the tree my Frisk and Az sat under. She fed them to her Pokemon before returning them to their balls. "Blue is looking for the two of you."

"Really?" Frisk popped up in front of her face, excited. Lacking a Sans of her own, she'd latched pretty firmly on the 'classic' version. The same way I had somehow become her surrogate Chara.

"*yep."

She swung around, hugging him.

"*hey there, kiddo! " He picked her up to twirl her around. When the skele-man set her down, she plopped down on her butt giggling. He looked at me. "*i've got a couple jobs for you two."

"Us two?" I pointed at Frisk. "As in her and I?" I shrugged. "All right. I'll take the bait. Why the team up?"

He smiled and looked to the side. Meaning that he was going to tell me A while meaning B. "*you two get along well enough and i've got two different timelines with some interesting problems. i'm sure you two can handle it."

Frisk reached up for my hands. "I'm game. Let me grab my bag from the equipment room."

I pulled her up. "You okay with handling the equations?"

She nodded. "Fase gives them to me with half the numbers in place so it's not hard."

I noticed my Frisk looking at me when I turned to Blue. She waved sleepily and I gave her a wink. It'd taken a long time for us to get to the point where we were comfortable being timelines apart. The first time I'd taken a mission away from her, it'd taken all we had in us to be able to stand it.

"So what are we in for?"

He shrugged. "*standard anomalies. when you finish the first, give fase a call for the next."

I resisted the urge to groan. "All right." I headed for the building, Frisk on my heels.

"What's up with the lack of info?" she asked as we headed down the hall.

"It's a test."

She blinked. "For?"

"Full agent status."

"No way." She looked confused. "Really? I mean, I haven't even finished college yet. And I'll still have years more of school after that."

I opened the door to the equipment room for her. "It's not about education. It's about skill and a certain savviness."

"So why aren't your Frisk and Asriel being tested?"

"They aren't looking to be full agents, just auxiliary."

"Does it have something to do with Frisk's twenty-second birthday?" Frisk pulled her bag from the shelf and tossed me mine. "I've heard you guys talk about that. It's really a big deal, huh?"

I sighed. "It's when she officially becomes an adult among monsters in our timeline."

She went silent. Suspiciously so. And I wondered if that meant she understood the implications.

"Queen Toriel worried about that for me, but didn't explain it." She shouldered her bag. "And mom..." She smiled suddenly, happy to so easily call the Frisk who raised her 'mother.' "Talked for a long time about coming of age in a Fell world." She looked at me. "It's really complicated for your Frisk, isn't it?"

"Yes and no. Everyone in the Underground made their public declarations as she made her journey. It's the formal ones that are at issue. Can you keep something under your hair?"

She lifted a dark lock to look at it and dropped it. "Totally."

"Asriel's proposing at the official celebration that names all three of us adults."

Frisk smiled. "That'll stick a potato in a couple tail pipes!" She frowned. "What about you? I'm sure more than a few monsters will want to make formal declarations to you."

I frowned. "I'll deal with it as I need too."

She sighed, patting my shoulder. "Ready?"

I nodded.

Frisk pulled out her phone and dialed Fase. The voice of creepy doom filled our ears as I put an arm around her waist. We fell into the void, floating for just a bit, before landing in a room with blue gray paneled walls a a blue gray tiled floor.

And immediately dove to avoid fire from a white robot on black legs with one red laser eye. The sound of a plasma shot going off made me flinch and an orange ringed hole opened on the floor between us.

"*quick! in the hole!"

I couldn't see where the voice was coming from, the angle of the shot put them behind me and I couldn't risk looking away from the robot trying to mow us down. Frisk rolled across the floor and fell through the hole. I followed quickly and came out a blue ringed hole on a platform only to landed on my shoulder. Frisk helped me to my feet and I immediately saw the problem. A dapperly dressed Victorian skeleton in a top hat and brown suit, with a myriad of shining brass tools attached to his belt.

Steam stood in front of us with a portal gun in his boney hands.

Frisk hugged him. "Steam! How did you end up here?"

He hugged her back. "*i'm not exactly sure. i was working on a new portal device with the doctor and when we activated it, i ended up here."

"So why not just teleport out?" I asked, rolling my shoulder.

"*i don't carry one of the void badges on me, so i don't have a piece of the void with which to travel."

"Well, I'm here now so you have your piece of the void to get you home," Frisk said. She held out her hand.

I put an arm around her as Steam took her hand. Nothing.

Steam frowned. *well. it seems like we can come in but we can't leave."

"Impossible," I countered. "Leaving must be contingent on something."

"perhaps we need to leave the building."

Frisk nodded and looked around. "This is totally a Portal test chamber, even if the portal gun wasn't a complete give away." She frowned. "Have you seen another Sans or Papyrus?"

Steam shook his head.

"So Portal with Frisk as Chell then?"

I nodded. "Maybe. He might have switched places with this world's Sans. Let's exit the test chamber and see if we can leave from there." I looked around and located the exit... right in front of the turret. "We need to take out the turret."

"any ideas?"

Frisk pointed to the ceiling. "Portal up there and one underneath the turret. It will be smashed by the fall."

"*okay." Steam shot the ceiling directly above the turret and directly below. He laughed, watching it fall in an endless loop. Until the red eye managed to turn, spot us on the balcony, and fired.

I pulled Frisk and Steam to the side before pulling the portal gun from his hand. "Ha ha." I shot to change the entry portal and the turret crashed to the floor, breaking apart.

Steam smiled and shrugged. "*well if you wanna do all the work, i won't stop ya."

I placed a portal on the wall next to the exit and one on the wall next to us. We stepped through and went through the incandescent particle field over the exit.

Frisk leaned back against the elevator railing as the door shut behind us and took us to the next floor. "So does this mean we have to deal with GLaDOS?"

The elevator stopped and we exited into a new chamber. A digital version of my own voice came over the PA system. " _Two of you are not my current test subject. You both will now be ejected from the testing area."_

The floor opened underneath my feet and I fell into a dirty, broken test chamber. I crouched when I landed to transfer some of the momentum. Steam landed next to me with a groan. I looked up and caught a brief glimpse of Frisk before the trap door closed.

Steam tapped my shoulder. "*there's an exit over there." I nodded and followed him over the debris. "*any idea of where we might be in relation to frisk?"

"The floor below. This place exists on duct work and the machinery in it. So if we can find a way behind the walls, we can get up to her faster." I smirked. "Knowing her, she's probably already on GLaDOS-me's last nerve."

Steam smiled. "*then we should hurry."

"So where is the exit you spied?"

He pointed to an open doorway on a balcony over our heads and then laughed at my expression. I aimed and pulled the trigger. The shot went past Steam's head and opened a portal on the wall a story above him.

"*you missed."

I smiled. "No, I didn't." I place the next shot under his feet. Steam fell through the portal and came flying out the other, sailing across the room to slam into the far wall and slide down slowly to the balcony.

"*oooohh..."

I chuckled as I jumped through the portal and landed on the balcony.

"*you really are a little prick."

"Well, I do have to live up to my name." I offered him a hand up and he took it. We headed through the open door way and found another broken test chamber. The wall to my right was a shambles, the machinery inside half falling out and a complete wreck. I grabbed Steam's collar and pulled him after me, dashing for the break in the wall. Climbing inside, I found writing and messy drawings all over the walls. I paused to have a closer look, when the wall was suddenly ripped away from the other side.

Standing over me as a massive ninja outfitted in black from head to toe. Crow hefted the piece of wall and tossed it casually behind himself. Frisk stuck her head in the hole, dark hair half in her face. "Hoi!"

"Yo."

" _The Enrichment Center is required to remind you that dismantling any part of the test chamber will result in immediate transport to the Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator!_ "

"Hey me! Screw you!" I nodded for Frisk to follow me between the walls and Crow disappeared in a wisp of smoke.

" _What are you doing?_ "

None of us answered, heading in between the walls, following the writing that covered them.

" _You haven't escaped, you know_. _You're not even going the right way_."

Frisk put a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing.

" _Hello? Is anyone there?_ "

We came to a junction between test chambers and arrows shaped like bones directed us to the left. We came to an office filled with actual sunlight coming in through the windows and green plants having overgrown their pots all over the room. We walked over to the windows of broken glass and looked down on a broken and long abandoned facility. I fired a portal into the outside wall at ground level and another into the wall next to us. The three of us walked out of the building.

I rested the portal gun on my shoulder and put an arm around Frisk. "Lets try heading back to your place, Steam."

He nodded. "*indeed. i am interested to meet the frisk who lives in this world." He took Frisk's outstretched hand and we leaped into the void, landing solidly in the Shipworks. Frisk stepped away from me to look up at all the flying ships in the bay.

"Sans!" Steam's Frisk nearly bowled him over in the rush to hug him. "Where were you? Are you okay? You have to see the Frisk that replaced you when we activated the portal!" He pulled Steam over to Dr. Gaster's office. Inside was an adult Frisk with long brown hair in a pony tail, layered tanks, orange pants, and long fall boots, eating a piece of cake.

I chuckled. "I guess the cake wasn't a lie this time."

Frisk snorted next to me, arm resting on my shoulder as she laughed.

Portal Frisk smiled. "It's actually pie that's a lie for me."

"That.. actually makes a lot of sense."

"So now what? Do we drop her back home?" Frisk asked.

Portal Frisk stood. "I am ready to go back." She held out a hand toward me. "I will need my portal gun."

"Oh! Yeah." I handed it to her. "We did make the A.I. me pretty pissed off. Sorry about that."

She shrugged. "No biggie. CHaRA is a blow hard."

"So do you not have a Sans?"

"I do. But he's not well. Did you get in between the walls?"

I nodded.

"That's his writing. He hasn't been well since CHaRA killed off everyone else in the facility with neurotoxin."

Dr. Gaster stood, smoothing out his suit. "Since it was my device that caused this mess, I think it's only proper that I take you home myself." He pulled out a green and black void badge and fixed it to his dress shirt under his checked black and gray vest. He offered his arm.

"*be careful, doctor. we couldn't teleport away inside the building," Steam supplied.

Portal Frisk smiled. "I can get him to an exit." She took his arm with a smile and they disappeared.

Steam sighed. "*i really did want to talk to her about her timeline."

I patted him on the back. "It's not like you can't get there."

Gaster and Portal Frisk reappeared, Frisk laughing hysterically.

"It seems I forgot to ask for the equation..."

I held out my phone with the equation displayed and they disappeared again.

Frisk put her head on my shoulder. "He gets worse all the time!"

I laughed. "Ready for number two?"

She stood up straight. "Totally."

I put my arm around her as she called Fase. The voice of creepy doom filled our ears and we fell into the void. It felt like we were falling forever through the dark. I gripped Frisk tighter but she was completely relaxed, brown eyes reflecting the dark around her serenely. She was in her one true element, hanging in it just as long as she could. I relaxed and floated with her, resting in an endlessness dotted with the occasional bright spark of a timeline.

"So... uh... What's the deal with you, your Frisk, and your brother? Are you three like..." She trailed off at my glare and then waved her hands at me in surrender. "I'm sorry! Oh gosh! Don't kill me!"

I rolled my eyes. "We aren't a threesome."

Emboldened, she leaned in. "So what is it? You and Frisk touch each other, like, all the time."

I put my hand on her face and gently pushed her back. "That's because, for a very long time, we shared the same body. We aren't over the separation. I don't know if we ever will be. And no, Frisk and I do not have romantic feelings for each other."

I sighed, gripping her hand a little tighter. "She's my partner. Her power awakened me from death and she took on a harsh burden for herself so that I would have a body of my own. Being her shadow is the purpose of my reincarnation. And I will stay with her forever."

She smiled sadly. "So what about you doing normal things like marriage and kids?"

I thought of the Lab and the horror my father had willingly sent me too. "Those things were never within my reach."

Frisk grabbed the bottom edge of my coat sleeve and shook it back and forth. "They are now."

I blinked and looked at her. "Are you hitting on me?"

"Oh no! Not my type!" She entwined her arm with mine. "I like hanging with you because, well, just like me, you aren't supposed to exist." She laid her head on my shoulder. "And yet, our existences make so many people happy."

She looked me in the eye. "You know, I kept waiting to be kicked out of the Foundation when I turned eighteen. But no one asked me to leave. When I talked to King Asriel about it, he was honestly confused and wanted to know why anyone would ever send me away from my home."

I thought about Red packing me lunch before I headed out for the day, always including a piece of chocolate. And Papyrus pacing the living room while he waited for me to return from a mission. I thought about Undyne gently caring for my wounds while I recovered from one of her training sessions. I thought about my brother's hugs and Frisk's bright smile, the one she saved only for me.

She let go of the float and we fell backwards into a timeline. Reality opened around us, embracing us as we put our feet down in snow.

Frisk and I looked around the dark forest. Something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong. I'd been to several really terrible Fell worlds and a couple Horror timelines but this? This place set off every bell and whistle in my head. Crow was suddenly with us, eyes watching our backs.

A whimper up ahead caught our attention. We ran for the sound and found a young Frisk, not more than twelve years old, stuck in a bear trap, shivering. The clothing he still wore was shredded and the warmest clothing in the best condition lay in a pile next to him. The lantern he carried was whole, but the light had gone out.

"You help him and I'll watch our backs."

Frisk nodded. "Got it." She knelt next to the boy. "It's okay. We can help." She gestured to her exemplar. "This is Crow. He's going to open the trap."

Crow pulled the trap apart easily, snapping the hinge. The boy's leg was a mess and I gave Frisk full points for not flinching when she saw the damage. I'd wondered if she'd see worse in one of her classes. She pulled on a pair of gloves before carefully inspecting the wound, feeling around it.

She looked up at me and signed, ' _The leg is broken. He's lucky his foot is still attached.'_ She touched his face. "Hypothermia. Crap." She tossed his piled clothing to me. "Would you dry those out, please?"

"Yeah." A bit of fire magic had the clothing dry and warm. Crow took my place at watch while I got the kid dressed. Frisk disinfected the wound and splinted the leg, aligning the bones carefully before bandaging. She pulled a thermos of spider cider from her bag and held it to his lips, feeding it to him drop by drop. Thirty minutes later, he cuddled against her, holding onto her jacket for dear life.

"So... now what?"

I frowned and picked up the lantern, relighting it with a little fire magic. "Good question. We're outside of Snowdin, but past the first sentry check point. Where is Sans and why isn't he here to help?"

"Here, get on my back." Frisk knelt and the kid climbed on her back. She handed her bag to me and I shouldered it to the side. "This is definitely a horror time line. Maybe he isn't helpful at all." She looked both ways on the path.

"Any idea why he pulled his clothing off?"

She nodded. "People suffering from hypothermia become easily confused and often strip their clothing thinking they'll be warmer with less on."

"That's actually kind of terrifying."

"Yeah." She hefted the boy, who gripped her tighter. "Do we take him back to the Ruins or do we go for Snowdin?"

I looked toward Snowdin. "Let's get him to Snowdin. We should run into Sans and Papyrus along the way and have a better idea of what's going on."

We headed down the path, Crow watching our backs. The wind picked up and snow began to fall. We picked up the pace and hid in the first of the two Dog Marriage sentry posts. We huddled together, waiting out the storm.

A strange whistle carried over the wind, followed by a sing song voice. "Come, little one... I smell your blood..."

The boy huddled against Frisk. I summoned a sword and the boy suddenly grabbed my arm, shaking his head. He quickly extinguished the lamp. A dog sentry looked inside the station, staring directly at us with white, lidless eyes, before moving along to the next station. When it came back, it paused, sniffing the air.

"I smell you..."

It trudged away as the storm died down. Frisk and I looked at each other as the boy re-lit the lantern with a match from his pocket.

She shrugged and stood. "Let's hurry."

We hurried deeper into the cavern, heading for Snowdin only to stop at the path being covered completely by traps. Not puzzles. Traps. Traps meant to maim and kill. Faun, the deer monster, was caught in one and the white eyed dog was eating him _while he was still alive_. Frisk dropped the boy and turned to vomit off the side of the path. Crow stepped in to protect the kid while I summoned my sword.

The white eyed dog heard the snow crunch under my feet, but couldn't see me as I walked toward him. He moved toward the sound just enough that I could move to the side and take his head off in one clean stroke. The body hit the ground while the head rolled behind a tree and out of sight. The body didn't turn to dust. It lay there and twitched. I looked to Faun. I did not have enough Monster Food to cure his wounds. Nothing less than butterscotch pie would save him.

"kill... me..."

My shoulders fell. "I'm sorry." I swung true and Faun was no more.

I waited for the coldness to come over me, the rise in level.

Nothing.

' _Chara..._ '

A dark chasm opened somewhere inside me. I fell to my knees, holding my head, willing that chasm shut. A pair of hands rested on my shoulders.

"It's okay."

Another hand, much smaller, touched my back, and the chasm shut. I opened my eyes and looked up at Frisk. She smiled softly as she pulled out a handkerchief and wiped my face.

"Man, this stuff is sticky."

I looked at the black fluid on the white fabric and shuddered.

Frisk folded the hanky up and tucked it away in a pocket. "What happened? By the look on your face, I'd say it's happened before."

I sat back on heels. "During a mission, Frisk called my name and..." I sighed. "I don't know. I don't remember."

"Frisk didn't tell you?"

I shook my head.

"It's because you're Chara, isn't it?"

The boy behind me gasped and backed away. "Chara!"

A whisper rose on the wind. ' _Chara... Chara... arise! arise!'_

The boy grabbed his head. "No! No! Go away!"

I took his hands in mine. "Hey. The demon cannot take you if you don't give him a path into your heart. He can scare you and that can make you feel weak. But being scared is normal." I smiled. "Sometimes it's even fun." I stood, holding his hand. "Come on. We're almost to Snowdin."

"Teddy."

"Teddy?" Frisk and I asked at the same time.

He pointed down the path and standing in the trees was Sans. A massive, seven foot tall skeleton with thick bones and sharp teeth. With his boney hands in the pockets of his black hoodie, he strode up to us.

"*where ya been, kid? been lookin' all over for ya." He nudged Faun's corpse with his foot. "*looks like you found us some dinner. though this guy's had all the good parts eaten already." He picked up the dog monster's headless body by one lung and flung it over his shoulder. "*this'll do nicely."

Sans looked at Frisk and I, regarding us for a moment before shrugging. "*so what's a couple of seraph agents doin' here?"

"Don't know yet," I replied.

Sans turned his back on us and the kid ran up to take his free hand. "*well, come on then. hot dog is on the menu tonight."

"I am not eating that," Frisk muttered.

I agreed.

"*so where'd the kid pick you two up?"

"We found him in a bear trap," Frisk growled.

Sans shrugged. "*happens."

I put a hand on her shoulder to calm her and keep her from saying something that would get us both in trouble.

"*when we get to snowdin, people are gonna try to kill ya for food. humans are pretty delicious after all. be ready for that."

Just as we stepped into town, a rabbit monster with sharp teeth jumped me and I dispatched it quickly. The other monsters backed off and watched us cautiously. Again, my level remained steady. "What's going on?"

"*what are you yappin' about?"

"Why hasn't my level gone up?"

"*because in this place, LoVE don't mean nothin.' you live. you die." He opened the door to the house. "*doesn't mean you won't grow colder and more distant in a different way."

"Hey Sans!" a monster yelled from the door of Grillby's. "Collecting more human pets?"

"*fuck you."

"The kid's got nothing on 'em, so it's no loss if you keep 'em around. But those two look like good eats!"

I summoned two red swords and sent them at the monster. The blades embedded themselves deep in the wood of the door on either side of the monster's head. "Oh shit! They know magic! Never mind!"

Sans chuckled and let us in the house. "*hey paps! i got us some dinner."

Papyrus was so tall, spindly he had to duck to come out of the kitchen. "TWO FULL GROWN HUMANS! FOR ONCE YOU ARE DOING YOUR JOB!" He cackled. "GET THE CROSSES READY!"

"*nah paps. the dog is dinner. those two are from seraph."

"SERAPH..." He leaned in to look at Frisk and I. "WHY WOULD SERAPH COME HERE? WE HAVE NO ANOMALIES."

"Fase sent us, so here we are."

"I DO NOT LIKE THIS. TWO PERFECTLY GOOD HUMANS AND WE AREN'T CRUCIFYING THEM?! THIS DAY COULD NOT BE ANY WORSE!" He plopped down onto the sofa and turned on the TV.

Instead of one of Mettaton's many, many shows, a Temmie stared out from the screen.

"*things just got worse."

"It's a Temmie," Frisk said. "How are they bad?"

"*they are the most powerful and terrifying thing in the underground. they're usually too busy runnin' their village to give a shit about anything else so the rest of us stay safe." He glanced at my raised eyebrow. "*relatively speaking."

"Temmie need human! Temmie need human Frisk!" The Temmie on the screen vibrated excitedly. " _Bring to Temmie_."

"*fuck. paps, hide the kid. i'm heading to the temmie village."

"No!" The boy grabbed a hold of Sans' hoodie. "Don't go, Teddy!"

"We'll go," Frisk said. "We'll find out why they suddenly want Frisk and take care of it. You two take care of Frisk."

There was a banging on the door. "Hand over the human, Sans!"

Sans put the kid on his shoulder before grabbing Frisk and I. Papyrus put a hand on his brother. "*why don't i make this easier for all of us?" He took a short cut and we were all standing outside the Blook family farm. "*you two get this fixed quick."

We nodded and headed into the darkness, touching the glowing mushrooms to illuminate the way. We turned a corner and found it. The Temmie Village looked the same as every other one I had ever seen. The difference was the Tems. Black and red bodies with pale white faces that looked pasted on. They didn't bother us as we walked to the shop.

Inside the shop, the Temmie behind the counter was looking into a studio camera, delivering her message. I walked over and turned the camera off.

"Hoi!"

"Why do you want the kid?" Frisk asked.

"Need more Tem Flakes!"

"Tem Flakes?" I closed my eyes and prepared myself for the obvious answer to the next question. "What are Tem Flakes?"

"These!" She held out paws full of ripped up construction paper.

Frisk winced as she asked the next question. "And how do you make them?"

"Send paper through shredder."

"And...?"

The Tem's pale face looked like it was starting to fall off. "Send human through shredder to soak flakes with human blood!" The pale face fell off completely revealing a black countenance with a red, red smile. "You humans too! You make good Tem Flakes!"

It stood, growing impossibly tall for the small room. We ran out into the village to give ourselves room and found the pale faces had fallen off of all the Temmies. Frisk summoned Crow and he appeared, forming a circle in which each of us had the back of the the other two.

"We need a plan, Chara."

I counted. "We've got nine Temmies and Sans' word that these things are the big bads. I'm not sure I can come up with a plan for this that doesn't involve us getting ripped to shreds." I looked around.

" _Let me help."_

I felt the chasm opening inside me. Dark and red. "No..."

 _"You are me. I am you. Help me erase this worthless world!_ "

I closed my eyes and thought of Red and that piece of chocolate. Papyrus and his pacing. Undyne and the bandages. Asriel and his hugs. Frisk and her smile. The smile she reserved for me. Just for me.

I felt Frisk put her hand on my back. I could feel the endlessness of the void in her and this world's Chara shuddered. "You are right. You are him and he is you. And for that reason, you should fear."

The chasm closed.

The Temmie's vibrated excitedly. "Humans! Humans!"

"He is not motivated by hate. His motivation is love. And love is a power far more frightening than your petty revenge."

The spirit shuddered against Frisk's words, pulling away completely.

Frisk leaned in, her lips next to my ear, and whispered like she was reciting an incantation, "Chara."

Something, somewhere inside me, snapped. I could feel the wetness on my face, the black fluid as it dripped from my eyes. It filled my mouth and leaked from the corners of my lips. I could feel it on my back, slicking my sweater and sticking my coat to me. When I summoned my sword, what appeared was not my red blade. It was a dark green fountain pen and wept the same black ichor that dripped from me.

I stepped forward. " _I am demon that comes when people call my name_."

A flash blinded me. When I could see again, the Tems all had their pale faces back in place. The shop keeper was behind the desk in the shop.

Sans and his Frisk ran to us, Papyrus striding behind them. "*i don't know what you kids did. but the tems are all back to normal."

"Yeah." I touched my face, but the black ichor was gone, like it'd never been there. I took a deep breath. "Time to head home."

Frisk looked at me and shook her head. "I'm not sure how I feel about leaving Frisk here."

The boy squeezed her hand. "I'll be safe with Teddy and Tippy. Promise."

I rubbed the boy's head, ruffling his hair. "Like you, he's filled with Determination. I think he'll be fine. But I am leaving my supply of Monster Food with him."

Frisk nodded and dumped all of our healing food into a bag for the boy. He took it with a grateful smile. We made our goodbyes and went back into the void.

"What happened?" I asked.

"I, uh, summoned you." She laid back in the darkness of the void, floating. "When I saw the black stuff on you earlier, it made me remember something. Something from the Frisk I'm copied from. Her Chara doesn't possess her. Her exemplar is Chara. In a moment of real distress, she doesn't summon the exemplar. She summons Chara. When you told me about your Frisk calling for you, I thought, maybe, I could do the same. And, wow, was I right!"

I laid back, holding her hand, and floating with her. "So what happened?"

"You were leaking the black stuff all over. But when you swung the pen, it wasn't like you were cutting things. It was like you were writing and drawing and all that black was ink. You weren't destroying. You were editing and repairing."

"I don't remember any of that."

Frisk squeezed my hand. "We can ask Blue about it." She righted herself in the void, pulling me up with her, and our feet touched solid ground outside the equipment room. We stowed our bags and found Blue waiting for us.

The skeleton smiled. "*well done, kids. you really knocked this one out of the park!"

"Did you know what would happen to me in the horror world?"

He shrugged. "*i had an 'inkling' that it might."

I groaned. "I could really use some answers here."

"*all right. all right." He shoved his boney hands in his pockets. "*you're a fell chara and fell chara's are, by nature, gentle people. they don't come off that way and that's understandable. fell frisk's don't meet their chara's until after all the bad stuff happens and you offer your help based on those experiences. i know that you often begged frisk to fight believing it was the only way until she proved it otherwise."

He inclined his head toward the cafeteria and we followed him down the hall. "*but you're still a chara. you're still affected by the original. but you have a choice in how you use that power. and when that part of you broke open, you didn't want to harm anyone. you only wanted to mend. that's a talent the foundation can really use." He pulled the cafeteria door open.

"Surprise!"

"Congratulations!"

"Well done!"

Frisk and I both ducked a little sheepishly at the crowd before we were pulled into the party, dodging balloons and confetti.

"I'm not sure I can eat right now," Frisk whispered.

"There's a cake over there and I'm pretty sure it isn't a lie."

She laughed as we were shoved in front of said cake. "Congratulations Agents Latha and Lucida!" was written across it.

I grabbed the knife and made the first cut before handing the knife to Frisk. I looked around and spotted my Frisk, my brother sitting with her. After getting a hug from Az, I sat down behind Frisk, putting my arms around her and resting my forehead on her shoulder.

"We'll be together forever, won't we?"

She wrapped her hands over mine. "Always."


	4. Ep 4 - The Bone Monkey

Core Issues: Season Three  
by Nicolle

Disclaimer: Undertale belongs to Toby Fox. G!Sans (who is taking a break from being our narrator) and G!Paps belong to Borurou. Fase is from Technotale. This version of SwapFell was inspired by the artwork of 22o22. This story is copyright to me.

Special Disclaimer:

1\. **Do not eat or drink while reading this one.** You have been warned.

2\. Rated T for language, sexual themes/jokes, and violence.

Ep. 4 - The Bone Monkey  
(Surfer SwapFell Sans is our narrator.)

I sat on the edge of the dead volcano's crater, legs danging down the drop to watch the sun rise over the deep blue ocean. Frisk sat next to me, snacking on a sandwich and occasionally licking her nose, while we waited for the sky to turn from black to a deep orange glow.

I regarded her for a moment, all black furred and long eared. After learning about other timelines, it'd struck me as odd that in a swap world, I had a Frisk and not a Chara. In fact, there was no Chara in my world at all. Fase had confirmed that for me after I'd finished my research. Flowey, who slept peacefully on Frisk's shoulder, was not the remains of Prince Asriel, who also did not exist here, but his own person.

More importantly, he was Frisk's husband. When Frisk had fallen from the ship and Flowey had attempted to save her, they had been on their _honeymoon_.

That bit of information had taken a while to really sink in. Frisk was always so excited, happy, and _youthful_ that she came off as being a child, when the opposite was true. Flowey never, in anyway, indicated that he found my brother frightening or a rival for Frisk. He didn't see the relationship as anything even remotely similar to what he shared with his wife. A statement that could not be denied when you saw the way Frisk interacted with him: deeply intimate and loving.

I felt a rend in time and space and White sat next to me with a thermos of liquid cheese in one hand. "Your brother not joining us?"

I smiled behind my mask. "Not a chance! Thanks for coming."

"Anytime."

Frisk jumped up. "Hey, White!"

"Hey there, Cutie-Pie!" He opened his arms for her hug. "How are you doing?"

"Good!" She hugged him before rubbing her nose against his.

"And how's Flowey?"

She smiled, lifting her shoulder a little to bounce her husband gently. "Still sleeping."

I reached over and tugged on one of Flowey's leaves. "Wakey wakey, Flowey."

He groaned a little and lifted his head. "The sun isn't even up, Sans."

"Yeah, but once it's up we need to be underway."

"I know. I know." The flower monster in his red and gold petaled glory sat up straight and looked around. "All four of us are here? Good. Listen very carefully. I shall say this only once."

Frisk and I rolled our eyes while White sighed.

"Abigail James, a spy in the employ of King Asgore, ruler of the Molten Cay at the southern most point of the archipelago and ex-husband of Her Majesty Queen Toriel, has stolen a sensitive document from our Queen. The document has been hidden inside a sculpture called the 'Bone Monkey,' which the spy also stole from the Her Majesty's gallery. It is assumed that James will present the Monkey as a gift to Asgore. Our job is to steal it back."

"What kind of sensitive document?" White asked as the sky began to glow a deep orange.

"I wasn't informed of that."

I rolled my eyes. "The b'scotch pie recipe. It's the only thing he ever asks for."

"Really?" Frisk began, "again? I love the old goat but he's worse than Plankton with the Kabby Patty Formula!"

"You know him?" White asked.

"Oh yeah! Flowey and I go to visit him at least once a month. That's how we'll get onto the island and to Old Home. We already have the papers in order to go." Frisk dug in her little bag and pulled out four visas, illuminated by a now pink and yellow sky.

"So where is the Monkey being kept?" I asked.

"The royal museum in Old Home."

"Is the Monkey really valuable or just something that she wants it back?" White asked.

"Well, the Bone Monkey is a really unusual," Flowey answered. "It's an ancient piece of monster art and very valuable."

"It's also cursed," Frisk said.

"Curses don't exist," Flowey huffed. The sun peeked over the horizon.

Frisk rolled her eyes. "It's cursed. The only reason the curse hasn't affected the Queen is because the curse is afraid of her."

"What does the Bone Monkey look like?" White asked.

"This." I held out my phone and showed him a pic.

"Wow. That's, uh, quite the big banana it's got there."

I nodded. "Yep."

"Admiral Winky's standing tall and proud!" Frisk giggled as the sky turned a bright blue.

Flowey's jaw dropped. "Frisk!"

She looked at him, innocent as can be. "What?"

I chuckled. "You're as bad as my brother sometimes, ya know?"

She smiled, proud to be compared to her BFF. "It is were the recipe was hidden."

The sun was fully up and I stood. "Time to go."

Frisk climbed up on White's shoulder as he stood and we headed down the path to a cable car.

"So if the curse is afraid of the Queen, does that mean Asgore's in trouble?" White asked.

"Oh yes," Frisk answered. "Keeping the pie recipe to herself is a bit of spite on Toriel's part, but she does love him still and she's really worried. Stealing the Monkey was a big miscalculation on the part of the spy."

Flowey through both leaf arms in the air. "There isn't a curse!"

We rode the cable car down to Sunrise. Grillby was already prepping his stand and the early risers were already out in the water. The surf looked great today. I sighed as I led us to the boat that would take us to the Molten Cay and Old Home. Flowey splayed out, laying on Frisk's head and soaking up the sun. Frisk panted a little in the rising heat and I handed her a water bottle. White pulled up his hood to protect his translucent skin from the inevitable sun burn. Damn but he was the palest man I'd ever seen and that's saying something. Queen Toriel remained incredibly pale despite living on a south Pacific island, but even her skin wasn't almost transparent.

The boat pulled into the Cay, navigating it's way through the lava plumes that fell into the water and gave the area it's name. The boat pulled up a protected dock and we disembarked for Old Home. Old Home was the first human settlement on the archipelago and the architecture reflected the time of the first humans who survived the plague long enough to build. Two story houses with tall columns and verandas that surrounded the entire outside on both floors allowed them to enjoy the beauty of their new home, even if it was a home in exile. Customs checked our visas and we headed into the town.

"So what's the plan?" White asked.

"You hack the security system to shut it down around the Monkey. Frisk distracts everyone while I switch out the Monkey with a fake. Flowey will be in the walls to provide back up as necessary. After we leave the museum, we check for the recipe. If it's still in the Monkey, all we have to do is head home. If it isn't, we head to the royal home and steal it from Asgore's kitchen."

"And how to do we get it from the royal kitchen?"

"Frisk walks in the house and comes out with it. It'll only take her a couple minutes."

White looked at Frisk. "Asgore really likes you, huh?"

She nodded. "When Queen Toriel was chasing me down, Papyrus hid Flowey and I here while he worked on the cure." She frowned when she saw a crowd around the museum entrance. "That does not look good."

Frisk hopped down from White's shoulder and ran up on all fours, Flowey holding onto her shoulder tightly. "Hey everyone! What's going on?"

"Hey! It's Frisk and Flowey!"

Several people crowded around her and an Old Home resident picked her up so they were eye level with the crowd.

"His Majesty went in the museum to work on a new exhibit and the whole place went dark!"

"There's this weird mist in some sections of the museum and strange monsters in others that have been attacking anyone close enough."

Frisk wiggled her nose, eyes filled with Determination. "Is Asgore still inside?"

"Yes."

She was about to jump down and paused to look at me. "What's the plan?"

The crowd turned to me and I resisted the urge to shrug. "White, head to security to check the cameras. Flowey, do your wall thing. Frisk, you come with me."

Frisk jumped into my arms and I put her on my shoulder. Flowey dived into the ground and disappeared. White followed me into the building.

"Security is behind the main desk. We're still on mission. We can use this as our distraction and save Asgore at the same time."

"On it!" White ducked behind the desk and immediately winced. "Oh woah!" I doubled back to look over his shoulder. The security system was in shambles. "Someone's already killed the system."

"Why?" Frisk asked. "I doubt it's about the Bone Monkey and the recipe inside its bed snake."

White's head hit the desk while I fought the urge to laugh. "Whoever did this might be after Asgore."

Frisk sighed. "Just because he's kind and more likely to make a peaceful resolution doesn't mean he can't completely beat you to a pulp." Her face fell. "Oh no! If you're right, Queen Toriel is going to be so pissed!"

White looked up at us. "I thought they were divorced."

I shrugged. "It's complicated." I looked around. "The museum is two floors that make a complete circle on each floor. You go left. Frisk and I will take the right."

White stood. "Meet you on the other side." He headed down the left hall. Frisk and I went to the right.

Frisk rubbed her head against mine. "What do you make of the monsters everyone was talking about? I'm a monster, but they way they said it, it wasn't anything like me."

I scratched the itch she couldn't reach on her head. "I don't know. Just be ready to dive for cover."

She leaned into my hand, sighing with relief. "Can do."

I crept quietly through the gallery, making my way to the back. An overturned vase lay on the floor with a nasty looking crack going right up the middle. Several paintings had hit the floor, frames cracked. One large sculpture lay on it's side, but it was a modern piece so that might of been how it was supposed to look. The damage appeared to be caused by little more than the stampede for the exit.

There was a muffled whimper from behind the sculpture. I looked around it and found a small boy curled up and crying quietly. I came around the side to check him for injuries. "Hey there, grommet. It's okay. I'm not gonna hurt ya." He sniffed and crawled out from where he'd wedged himself. Besides a few bumps and bruises, he looked fine. "Will you take him outside?"

"Sure thing!" Frisk hopped down and stood on her hind legs to help the boy up.

"When you come back in, head up to the second floor and wait at the top of the stairs for White and I."

She walked the boy back down the hall, holding his hand. Her butt waddled back and forth in that weird way it did when she walked upright. I headed deeper into the gallery. Turning carefully I scanned the area behind me to be sure I was alone. When I turned around, White ran into me. We both hit the floor, holding our heads.

"Damn it, White! Could you be a little more careful?"

"Careful? There's an undead menagerie behind me and you want me to be careful?" We sat up, grabbed each other's hand, and pulled ourselves off the floor. "So now that I'm here, what were your other two wishes?"

"What was that about undead?"

"Blue cast skin, completely white eyes, red ichor coming from the mouth, nose, eyes, and various wound areas."

I frowned. "Islanders?"

White shook his head. "They lack the scaring that you have."

Blue skinned zombie came up behind White. I pulled a gun and shot the thing point blank in the face. The head exploded and the monster fell to the ground.

"Holy shit, you're fast!"

"I work with weapons all day, White. I know what I'm doing." I holstered my gun. "How many where that way?"

"At least eight humans, two dogs, four cats, three crows, and one really pissed off peacock."

I smiled and leaned back on my heels, arms crossed. "And what did you do to piss of the peacock?"

"Exist in it's territory."

"Well I hope that teaches you a lesson about being a corporeal being."

He shoved me back around the way I came. "There aren't any people behind me that need evac. I suggest moving to the next floor before the zombies find us. We need to find Asgore and the Monkey with the doughnut holder."

I swallowed my laugh. "Are you and Frisk competing for best euphemism?"

White smiled, blue eyes suddenly too big. "Now we are!"

We headed back down the way I came as Frisk was coming back in the building.

Flowey appeared and climbed on her shoulder. "Well. The curse exists. I owe you a Coke."

Frisk kissed her husband on the cheek.

I looked up the stairs. "What's on the second floor?"

"It's like someone set off a firework made of blood."

White huffed. "So it's Resident Evil?"

A strange moaning came up behind us. Several zombies shambled around the corners to the stairs. Flowey wrapped up his wife in vines and disappeared with her into the floor. White and I dashed up the stairs and through the door into the upper gallery. A mist filled room met us as we opened the door.

"I take it back. It's not Resident Evil. It's Silent Hill."

"You play too many video games."

"Life is a video game, Sans. We just don't get to hit the reset button when we die."

"Nope! I do!" Frisk giggled.

I turned 360 degrees and saw nothing. "Where are ya, Furball?"

"Flowey dropped me in the HVAC. I'm in the vent above you. I'll look around the floor on the right side from the vents."

"Your husband could have warned us about the fog."

"It wasn't here a few minutes ago," Flowey said. I couldn't pin point where his voice was coming from, which usually meant he was in the walls or the floor somewhere. "Let's just find Asgore and the Monkey."

"The one with the snozwanger," Frisk so helpfully reminded us.

I looked at White as he chuckled behind his hand. "You take the right. I'll take the left."

He nodded. "I'll call if I find Asgore or the Monkey with the Wonder Worm."

Frisk giggled, Flowey groaned, and I shrugged, deciding to add to Flowey's pain. "Just remember to check for the recipe in the Zipper Trout."

I heard a thumping from the wall to my right where Flowey was banging his head on the inside of the wall. Well, at least I knew where he was. I headed to the left very slowly. The fog thickened the further I went, completely obscuring my vision.

Something in the fog grabbed me and threw me into a wall. I threw my hands back to take away some of the impact to my head and slid down the wall, groggy. I could just make out a large sculpture next to me. I ducked around it and threw my back against the wall, gun pointed toward the ceiling. Gulping in as much air as possible, I managed to get my breathing under control. A noise around the corner made me flinch and I scowled. Taking a quick look, a gray, smoky thing floated in the fog. With nowhere to run, I took aim and fired. The bullet went through as if it as if it didn't exist.

"You've got to be kidding me."

I stood and dashed for the thing, duck-rolling under it, and making for the other end of the hall way. Something grabbed my ankle and I hit the floor. Unlike the last, I was sure that this one was solid. It looked like one of Undyne's screwed up experiments. And it could talk. "Come here, little boy. I'm hungry."

I fired point-blank into the thing's face and it hissed, backing away. Oh fuck. Those bullets were special issue and made to destroy. This thing hardly looked hurt.

Scrambling to my feet, I holstered the gun and went through the door that led to the next gallery. I should have been in a room filled with renaissance paintings. Instead, it looked like an alley in a bad section of New Home. Disoriented, I sat down and tried to stop the spinning in my head.

"My pretty! Come out; come out, where ever you are!"

Taking a deep breath, I ran for a hanging ladder from a fire escape and jumped. I just barely got a hand on it and pulled myself up onto the first landing. Taking a moment to catch my breath, I looked around. The fog was getting thicker. The monster underneath me was completely invisible in a few seconds and when the fog cleared, I was sitting in the back stairwell of the museum on the landing to the roof.

How did I get here?

My shoulders dropped as I groaned. I stood and walked back down the stairs. Frisk had said the Monkey was cursed and that the curse had been afraid of Queen Toriel. Not surprising. We called her The Devil for a reason. And even with the flow of life on the archipelago moving toward something that approached what off-worlders called normal, she was still a force to be reckoned with. I saw White enter the stair well and ran down to meet him.

Big mistake.

When I rounded the corner, I tripped over a dead body on the stairs. Crashing into White, we both hit the platform for the second floor hard enough that a resounding crack flooded the well.

White checked himself and found nothing broken. And then he froze. "Sans?"

I winced, and bit down so I wouldn't scream when I moved my arm.

"Shit!" White rolled over to me and touched my shoulder. "C'mon, Sans, say something..."

"...something."

White sighed in relief. "You bitch. You had me worried."

"My right arm is broken," I gritted out.

White dug through his bag. "I've got a cinnamon bunny for that."

"Thanks." A little bit of healing later and I sat up. I looked at the body I tripped over. It was a hairless creature of some sort in an awful shade of pink. It looked as it if had been ripped too shreds by multiple ropes. "Well, someone got served."

"You can say that again. Looks like something took a hit from one of Flowey's attacks." White looked around and found the hole in the wall. Using a pair of tweezers, he pulled out a thorn. "Oh yeah. Definitely Flowey." He offered me a hand and pulled me to my feet. "So why'd you go up to the roof?"

"I didn't. We should have taken Frisk seriously and asked what the curse was." I knocked on the wall. "Hey Flowey? You around?"

I heard a slithering behind the wall and Flowey's golden petaled face popped out. "I wish your demon worshiping ass would banish this insanity!"

"I may be an agent of the Devil, Flowey, but my duties are largely ceremonial. Where's Frisk?"

"With Asgore. They've moved up to the roof." He took a breath. "We've got a huge problem. I've been all over the building and I can't find the Bone Monkey. I've been in every gallery, every office, every storage room, and in the conservation lab. I have no idea where it is."

"Let's get to the roof then. Asgore might have it on his person."

The sound of something massive moving through the walls around us jolted me the same way it always did when Flowey pulled himself back into his tiniest form. He jumped from the wall to my arm and climbed up to my shoulder. We made our way to the roof.

The roof was empty but for HVAC and sky lights. Frisk and Asgore were no where to be found.

Flowey panicked. "Frisk? Frisk?!"

White tugged on one of his leaf arms. "Calm down. We'll find her."

A fog rose up around us. When it cleared, we were in a cave surrounded by skulls.

"That's... almost disappointing." I sighed.

"I guess the curse doesn't get that we're just Sans-es with skin on?" White shrugged. "So do we wait this out? Or..." He grabbed my arm. "We RUN!"

He pulled me down the corridor as an awful screeching sound filled my ears. Looking back I saw a huge drill sawing through the tunnel and heading right for us.

"Wait! We don't know if this is an illusion! If we run outside the bounds of the building, we may end up falling to our deaths from the roof!" Flowey yelled. He dived from my shoulder and disappeared into the tunnel floor. The wall burst ahead of us and Flowey's vines pulled us into it. The drill went passed us and the fog took us again.

When the fog cleared, we were in an office.

"Where are we?" White asked.

"Assistant curator's office," Flowey answered. "We're on the first floor. I'm heading into the walls. I'll let you know when I find Frisk." He jumped from my shoulder and into the wall.

White looked around. "If the Monkey with the Komodo Dragon wasn't in the galleries, maybe it's in the offices."

"Good point."

White started searching the assistants office while I picked the lock on the head curator's office and went in. The Bone Monkey sat on her desk. "Found it!" I picked it up and turned it over, looking for a way to open the 'manimal.'

I wasn't having much luck when White came in behind me. He held out a hand. "Let me try. The meat flute has to have a way to open." He turned it back upright and his finger along the seam, finding a hidden catch. He popped it open and a rolled up paper fell out.

I unrolled the paper as he closed up the one-eyed cave dweller. "This is not the recipe."

"What is it?"

"I think this is from my mother's lab." I held out the paper. "I'm not as familiar with Gaster speak, but this looks like it."

White looked it over and winced. "Woah. Instant headache." He blinked a few times. "This is definitely Gaster speak and it's about plants. That's your mother's signature. Looks like the abstract of an article about increasing plant production for food on the archipelago."

"Well." My eye brows raised. "The plot thickens."

"Isn't Old Home still officially under Queen Toriel's rule?"

I crossed my arms over my chest. "Technically, yes. But the people who live here are very loyal to Asgore. Often to the point of refusing to trade."

"That's not good."

I shook my head. "No, it isn't. If it was the pie recipe, we'd just need to leave. But this indicates a bigger problem on the island."

White rolled up the paper and handed it to me. "Flowey said he checked the offices. Does this mean the Bone Monkey with the blind butler can move itself around?"

I shrugged and picked it up. For all the trouble it was causing, it wasn't that big. It only stood as tall as an average water bottle and as wide as my hand. I put it in my backpack. "Let's find out."

We headed back into the hall and out of the office doors back into the museum proper. Everything that had been smashed in the stampede to leave was back in place. The paintings hung on the wall, frames intact. The vase with the crack was back on it's pedestal, crack gone. The sculpture still lay on the floor, but that only confirmed that it was supposed to be that way in the first place. White tapped my shoulder and pointed to the window.

It was dark out.

We looked at each other for a moment before the sound of a key turning in the front door's lock caught our attention. We both ducked around the other side of the floor sculpture.

The spy, Abigail James entered the museum behind the head curator. "I'm telling you, something is up with this thing. Fog comes up out of no where and you start seeing some weird shit. You need to ditch the monkey!"

"I have wanted to study this sculpture since it first washed up on the beaches of New Home. Frisk confirmed that it is a piece of actual monster art, and I will not give up this chance just because strange things have been happening to you."

"Fine. I just need the document out of its... colossus... and I'll be on my way."

The curator pulled out a pair of tweezers to open the catch. It wouldn't budge. She snorted. "Well then. Come back in the morning. We'll open it when I have more light and tools." The pair disappeared into the offices.

White jerked on my sleeve. "Hey. What if the Monkey with the crotch cobra was a prison and when the curator opened it to get the document, she let something out?"

"But what would have been in there? Monster souls don't persist after death like human souls. Even Frisk, with all her Determination, is very fragile."

"Who said it had to be a monster soul? What if it is a human one? If the Monkey is older than the plague, then it's completely plausible."

I thought about that and nodded. "Let's follow the girls and see if we can get anymore info."

White nodded and we followed them into the offices, only to step onto the grand stairwell to the second floor galleries. The sun was up and shining again.

Flowey's head popped out of the wall. "There you are! You have no idea how good it is to see living people in the building," Flowey said. "Please tell me the spy is dead."

I blinked. "What? Why?"

"Because I found my wife and she's seriously hurt. One of things in here slashed her pretty good with a knife." Thick vines slid up from between the cracks in the hard floor, surrounding us both tightly. "Take a deep breath and close your eyes. We're going my way."

Having traveled Flowey's way before, I took his advice, ducking my head a bit when I closed my eyes. He put us out on the second floor in a storage room. Asgore sat at a long table, cradling Frisk in one well muscled arm while she drank some of Muffet's special cider from a thermos. His Majesty's clothing had seen better days and some of the gashes showed scarring from magically healed wounds. He'd grown out his hair since last I saw him, wearing it in a braid common among among the men on this side of the archipelago.

Flowey snaked up to the table top, leaning over his wife. "How are you feeling, Honey?"

She smiled at him. "Much better. I'll probably have a scar though, and oh man, you know how Papyrus is going to be about that!" Flowey nodded and they rubbed noses.

I let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding and turned to Asgore. "Do you have any idea what's going on, Your Majesty?"

He shook his head. "I came here this morning to attend the installation of several pieces of pottery that I helped Cassie prepare for exhibit."

"Cassie?" I asked.

"The preservationist."

"So what about the Bone Monkey?"

He shook his head. "I only found out about that from Frisk. Abigail James' assignment did not include stealing it."

White looked at me. "It seems like the head curator arranged that."

Asgore looked at White. "And you are?"

"Sans. But most people call me White for," he pointed to his face, "obvious reasons."

I nodded. "And the document?"

"Useless. It's only the abstract. I asked your mother to conduct a study on increasing crop levels years ago." He sighed. "Tori's been keeping the results from me."

I whistled low. "Her Majesty wrote the book on spite."

Frisk stretched and righted herself to step onto the table. Flowey wrapped several vines around her, holding her tightly while she brought up her paws to hug him.

I fought a groan when I said it, "All right, what's the curse?"

"I thought you'd never ask!" She wiggled her butt in the way she did when she was really happy to tell a story. "The Legend of the Bone Monkey with the taco warmer goes like this: There was a cruel and evil human dictator who was very proud of his sexual prowess, but was without a wife because no one would marry such a sick and twisted individual. So he made a decree that a woman must come forward to marry him and bare him children or he would slaughter every girl of marriageable age in the country. A beautiful and very shrewd widow presented herself. After a lack luster performance on the part of the dictator, so laughed at his pride in his prowess. He was so vexed he went to strangle her. But he was heavily intoxicated from the wedding feast and she knocked him over, rolled him up in a blanket, smothered him to death. Stealing his soul, she placed it the Bone Monkey to forever mock him. Now whoever possesses the Bone Monkey will be cursed with living nightmares unless they are so cruel the soul inside recognizes a kindred spirit."

White cocked his head toward me. "Explains why it's been quiet since you put it in your bag."

I shrugged. "That remains to be seen. You hypothesized earlier that the spirit inside the Monkey was let out by the curator."

"Has anyone seen the head curator?" Flowey asked.

Asgore nodded. "She was zombie that hurt Frisk."

"Where is she now?"

"In the gallery." A smile tugged at Asgore's lips. "In several charred pieces."

I smiled appreciatively. "Let's make like Flowey and leaf."

Flowey sighed. "Oh please don't turn into your brother! Papyrus' jokes are so terrible! The push all my buttons!"

Asgore stood. "I be-leaf that you don't have buttons."

Flowey's red and gold petals drooped around his face. "I forgot who I was in the room with." He looked at White. "What? No follow up?"

White snorted. "Your wife and I are in the middle of a euphemism war. And I will win."

Frisk stood up to her full height, which wasn't all that impressive, but her smile was full of mischief. "Thunderstick."

"Python of love."

She wiggled her nose. "Uncle Wiggly."

"Glow worm."

Frisk smiled big, lips pulling back from her little fangs. "Uterus unicorn!"

Asgore covered his eyes with one hand and laughed.

White threw his hands in the air. "I give up! I can't follow that one!"

"Time to go." I pulled the door open as Frisk jumped onto my shoulder.

Asgore took the lead. "Follow me. There's a hidden stairwell around the corner to the first floor. It let's out near the reception desk."

"Isn't this the part of the video game where the big bad boss monster shows up?" Frisk asked.

Asgore looked at her. "Well, only if you called my wife."

We came out of the stairwell around the corner and found the spy, Abigail James, or rather what was left of her. It looked like her skin had been split open from the back and stretched to block the museum entrance. While the rest of her skin was an awful yellow, her face was blue, eye sockets empty, ichor dripping from her mouth. The mouth opened and she screamed, writhing against her bonds. White and I summoned our bones while fire magic sprung to life in Asgore's hands.

I glowing red trident speared through the monster from behind and sliced up. The remains of the monster snapped and fell to the floor on either side of the door to reveal a very angry Queen Toriel, white hair swinging.

"I might have," Frisk said.

"You damn goat!" Her Majesty fumed, storming up to her ex, eyes glowing red. She was so tiny in comparison to him that she came off as even more terrifying. "Do you know how worried sick I was?"

Asgore blinked, honestly confused. "You were worried?"

Her fists shook and she looked about to punch him when her arms dropped. She sighed, head dropping, eyes closed. "Come visit me next week and I'll make you a pie." She glared at him through her hair. "Don't let it give you any ideas."

Asgore held up both hands sheepishly with a small smile.

Her Majesty held out one pale, delicate hand. "Give me the sculpture, Sans."

"Yes, Ma'am." I pulled it out of my bag and handed it to her.

Queen Toriel opened the sculpture. "Get back in here, maggot!" A human soul in a putrid shade of green formed in front of her. She snapped the Monkey shut on it. Handing the sculpture back to me, Her Majesty took the opportunity to scratch Frisk behind the ears. I knelt so she wouldn't have to stand on her toes when Frisk lowered her head. "See that it returns to the gallery. Call Dr. Undyne for a clean up of..." She looked distastefully at the remains of the spy. "That. I'm sure she'll find some use for the remains." She looked around. "And whatever else is left in here."

I stood. "Yes, Ma'am."

She sighed and stepped up to Asgore. "Today was the pottery installation, correct? Would you show me?"

He smiled and offered his arm, guiding her to the grand stairwell. Two of the royal guard followed behind them.

White leaned in to whisper, "So why are they divorced?"

"She threw him out for being weak years ago. But kindness isn't weakness and Her Majesty has a hard time admitting that she made a mistake." I smiled. "It doesn't help that he completely forgives her. She'd rather have something to fight."

"Ouch."

"Yeah."

"Well, today was an adventure!" Frisk clapped her paws together. "Who get's to tell Papyrus about my injuries?"


	5. Ep 5 - Book of Thoth

Core Issues: Season Three  
by Nicolle

Disclaimer: Undertale belongs to Toby Fox. G!Sans (our narrator) and G!Paps belong to Borurou. Fase is from Technotale. Underfell is a community project. ColonyTale is one of my AUs. This story is copyright to me.

Special Disclaimer:

1\. I only got one note about the last episode, so I'm pretty sure either no one liked it or my audience has left. I have a couple more episodes started, but I'm not feeling motivated so you'll likely only see one or two more episodes before I bow out and call it done.

2\. Rated T for language, sexual themes/jokes, and violence.

3\. I am on vacation next week with no guarantee of wi-fi. So you may have to wait two weeks for the next episode. For everyone reading ColonyTale, the next chapter will go up on Tuesday as normal.

Ep. 5 - The Book of Thoth  
(Army!Frisk/Church is our narrator!)

I rolled out the old, parchment map of Egypt on the table in the cabin. "Are you guys ready for some fun?"

The assembled four Frisks of my variation all laughed.

"Are we ever not?" Frisk Lyall, a rather short for a werewolf monster in brown fur, asked. He hadn't been a Viper, but a mercenary who worked in brute force before his fall. His Sans, a woman with a penchant for video games and biochemistry napped half on top of Red on the cabin couch. Blue slept against the other side. D lounged on the floor against the couch, snoring softly. For his part, Red had also fallen asleep. The scarf he'd been crocheting had hit the floor, falling from the hook in his boney fingers.

Frisk Provost, of the Colony Ship Delta, bumped against my shoulder. She'd been her Viper unit's engineer. "What've you got for us?"

"This is a map to the first clue in the hunt for the Book of Thoth, an Ancient Egyptian text of magic that is supposed to have been written by the god Thoth himself."

Cross tapped the map. "I sense danger, but I'm awfully tempted by the special candy."

I smiled at him. "This is so up your alley."

Frisk Stewart, a very tall, very lean man who'd worked as a body guard in his viper unit, sighed. "Who would've thought that the man who managed to kill me would be a crazy paranormal investigator?"

"You are into some serious X Files shit," Lyall said.

Cross shrugged. "You technically are X Files shit, Lyall."

"So what makes you think this real?" Frisk asked, leaning into me the way she always did.

I put an arm around her. "Nothing. But there's some very dangerous people out there who think it is real. I've been asked by my former CO to locate it first. If we get to the trail's end and it doesn't exist, we neutralize the leaders."

"What kind of targets?" Stewart asked.

"They call themselves the Thule Society."

"Nazis?" Cross snorted. "This just keeps getting better and better!"

Frisk frowned. "Neutralize meaning...?"

"Knock them out and drop them with our extraction." I touched the map. "We'll fly into Cairo and meet with our contact who will get us equipped. After that, we are on our own until we call for a ride home."

"So did your CO ask for a whole lot of you or what?" Lyall asked.

I smiled. "He asked as a favor and I get to pick my team."

Cross blinked. "And you aren't taking Bones?"

I sighed. "My world's Egypt is not very kind to monsters."

"So what about Lyall?" Stewart asked.

A short man with skin the same brown as the fur he'd previously worn was suddenly standing at the table with a big smile. "What about me?"

Stewart blinked. "You're an actual werewolf."

"Yep."

"What else does your timeline have?"

"Vampires, mummies, fairies, the works."

Stewart's eyebrows went up. "Sweet."

"Come visit some time and I'll show you around." Lyall looked at me. "When do we leave?"

"As soon as we're ready."

Cross gathered up the files. "Anyone speak Arabic?"

"Besides you, Mr. Polyglot?" Frisk smiled. "I'm good."

I rolled up the map. "Me too. Lyall? Stewart?"

Stewart shook his head. "I barely know my own language so I'll just be smiling and nodding."

Lyall had his phone out. "Just getting Arabic into my Rosetta mobile. I'll be good enough for regular conversation by the time the plane lands."

"How are we handling communication on the ground?" Cross asked.

C burst to life on my shoulder. "Yo." He sat on my shoulder. "The pins hidden in your lapels are system cores for me. I'll keep us all talking."

"Then let's be off." I stowed the map. We headed out the door and Sophia mobbed my legs. "Hey there, sweet pea!" I picked her up and snuggled her before kissing her nose. "You be good for daddy and Uncle Papaya, all right?"

"Yes, Mommy!"

I set her down and she ran on her tippy toes for her father. Bones swept her up and gave me a wink before turning back to his conversation with Frisk's Asriel and her sister Chara. Baby Brandon bounced on Papyrus' knee at the picnic table, giggling his little head off.

Cross put his hand on my shoulder. "You gonna be okay?"

I sighed. "Yeah."

Stewart rolled his eyes. "Such concern! It's almost as if you weren't trying to kill her a few years back."

Cross shook his head and looked at Frisk. "What? No pot shot at me for-"

Frisk put her hand over Cross' mouth, eyes red. "Say nothing. My sister and my Asriel are here. My sister doesn't know about the reset, but Asriel does. My Sans told him what happened to me. If he learns that you are the one who..." She shook her head.

Cross lifted her hand and tapped the gold ring. "His wife?"

I leaned in. "You finally gave in?"

She smiled, eyes purple yellow. "Yes."

Lyall put his arms around us. "Move it along, humans! We've got a date with Egypt."

The flight into Cairo wasn't comfortable but at least it was quick. We checked into a hotel with a view of the Nile from our rooms, and enough fake antiquities to label it a tourist spot. We stowed our fake luggage and headed for the point of contact for our equipment. The sun beat down on us as we walked through the old market into the shaded alleys filled with food vendors. Our equipment contact was supposed to be posing as a food vendor. Instead, he was posing as a fresh corpse.

Stewart watched our backs while Cross checked the body. "He's been dead about an hour."

Frisk lifted the fabric skirts around the stall, eyes yellow orange. "No equipment. By the marks on the ground, it looks like whatever was here was dragged away."

Lyall looked around the alley. "What symbol is the Thule Society using?"

I looked up from messaging in about our contact. "A black sun with two off kilter crosses in the middle."

Lyall cocked his head toward the wall. A small black sun had been spray painted over a few bricks. "Then they were here. Nice of them to leave a calling card."

"So now what?" Stewart asked.

"Same thing we always do in this sort of situation," Frisk said as she stood. "We improvise. Open up the map."

I pulled the map from the tube. "Since our point of contact is down, we'll head directly for the first clue to the whereabouts of the Book. The Temple of Luxor."

"Boat or jeep?" Lyall asked.

Cross stood. "Jeep. The river will be packed with tourists."

We headed out of the alley and back into the oppressive heat. Stewart 'found' us a jeep and we headed down the long dusty road for Luxor.

"Well, they know someone is on to them. How long until they figure out it's us?" Lyall asked.

I looked back at the three men in brown uniforms on horse back, riding up behind us.

"VIPER!"

Cross laughed from the wheel. "Your reputation precedes you!"

Several shots went over our heads and we all ducked. C pulled something and his grid overlaid my vision.

"Slow down!" Lyall yelled. "Let them catch up to us!"

Cross dropped the gear. "You got it!"

Frisk opened her bag and assembled her rifle, eyes red brown. She stood and braced herself against the jeep's overhead bars. She fired twice and the first horseman went down encased in foam core. The second horseman got up along side the jeep and I shot him in the chest. The foam core encased his arms and he hit the ground. Lyall jumped from the jeep, sprouting dark brown fur in mid air. He grabbed the third man from his horse and jumped back to us before the horse spooked.

Cross put the jeep back into a higher gear as Stewart bound the man's arms. I pulled off the scarf covering his face to reveal a blonde haired, blue eyed man.

Lyall shook off his fur and sat next to our new friend, putting an arm around his shoulders. "Buddy. Pal. Friend. Homeslice. How about you let us in on how you knew about us?"

The man smiled. "Your friend in the market was very happy to talk before he died. All we had to do was hide in the other food stalls and wait for you to show. We've already circulated your descriptions so you won't be able to hide. You definitely won't be able to hide after the sun goes down!"

I frowned. "Do you have the Book?"

He grimaced. "No."

"He's suspiciously talkative," Cross pointed out.

Frisk frowned, eyes green orange. "Agreed. But he's not lying."

Stewart looked to the sky. "It'll be dark by the time we hit Luxor."

"What happens after the sun goes down?" I asked.

Our Nazi went silent. He only smiled.

Stewart pulled his gun. "Pull over, Cross." As the jeep came to a stop, Stewart shot our Nazi with the foam core and dumped him on the side of the road. "We're good." He put up his gun as Cross got moving again. "So what do you think we'll find in Luxor?"

"Ancient tombs filled with traps and puzzles made to keep the book safe?" Lyall posited.

I rolled my eyes. "This isn't a steampunk timeline."

"Nah. It's totally Uncharted," Cross commented.

"So who's Nathan Drake?"

Cross snorted. "Not a single one of us."

Stewart kicked his seat. "Speak for yourself, Cross."

Cross laughed. We stopped at a tourist trap for some food before heading into Luxor as the sun set. Stashing the jeep in an abandoned garage, we snuck to the Temple and timed the guards going around it. When we knew we'd have a clean run, we dashed in via the first pylon. Once inside, we found the interior empty.

"Shouldn't there be guards in here?" Cross asked.

I nodded. "Something's up. The intel says there's a hidden chamber accessible in the Court of Ramses II, which is right where we're standing."

Frisk turned in a full circle, eyes blue purple. "This room? It's huge!"

"Yeah. But I'm betting you can find it."

She rolled her eyes, which was interesting to watch since the movement required the mechanical irises to spin. "Mechanical engineer not civil engineer."

I smiled. "I'm sure it's a device that needs triggering."

Frisk turned to one corner, eyes blue yellow. "It's likely in this direction. There isn't any excavation going on over there and there isn't a building on the other side of the wall, so no one has been digging around on that side." She headed for the corner, pulling out her flashlight, and sweeping the floor. "Here. The hieroglyphs are slightly off, like the wall moves between them." She put her finger along the symbols and found a crack going all the way to the floor. Following the crack, she found an out of place hieroglyph sitting by itself. She pressed it.

The stone slabs to her left slid open, revealing a stairwell into darkness. We all stopped for a moment to put on surgical masks to keep from inhaling mold spores while we descended.

"I volunteer Cross to go first," Stewart said.

Cross shrugged. "Fair enough." He turned on his flashlight and started down. I followed close behind, eyes over his shoulders as he hunched over to get through the stairwell let out into a small room with a piece of papyrus sitting on a pedestal. Instead of paintings and hieroglyphs, the walls were stark white.

I shined my flashlight on the papyrus to reveal writing in a language I'd never seen before. "Anyone have any ancient languages under their belt?" A round of shaking heads had me frowning. I pulled out my phone. "Fase? Do we have someone in the Foundation who reads ancient script?"

Fase's voice fell from the phone's speaker. "What kind of language is it?"

"It's hieratic script," C supplied.

"Can you read it, C?"

Behind my eyes, C laughed. "Oh hell no! I just googled an image of the text."

"Okay. So do we have anyone in the Foundation who can read hieratic script?"

"Oh yes!" Fase laughed. "There's an entire Ancient Egyptian style timeline! I'll patch you through to that Sans."

The phone rang and was picked up on the fourth ring. A sleepy voice came over the phone. "*nyny?"

"I don't speak Ancient Egyptian, Sans."

"*kemetian. the language is kemetian." I heard a creaking on the other end of the line, like he was sitting up. "*which frisk is this?"

"Bone's wife."

"*ah! one of the army frisks! what can i do for you?"

"We need a translation."

"*give me a sec and i'll come to you." A skeleton in a white, linen skirt with an elaborate belt of gold and blue lapis lazuli, and a collar style necklace to match the belt, appeared next to me. He looked over the script. "*ooh! interesting! listen up, kids. ' _I, Pareherwenemef, third son of the Great Usermaatre Setepenre, have found the Book of Djehuty in my studies of the west bank and secreted it away in this place_.'"

Sans looked up at us, left eye glowing a little in his excitement. "*pare here is the third son of ramses the second. he was the first known archaeologist and studied the history of his own country. of course, by the time he started doing that, kemet, what you call ancient egypt, had already been around for a couple thousand years." He looked back down at the script. " _After finding the book, I have been beset with enemies attempting to steal it for their own gain. I fear its hiding place in the temple will not be enough to safeguard it. I have asked my beloved brother Meryatum to take the book and find a new hiding place far from home. He has taken it deep into the mountains of Nubia. He has hidden the Book away in the resting place of Amanirenas._ "

He put a boney finger down on one piece of the script. "*can someone give me a map?"

I pulled the one from the tube and held it out for him.

"*the resting place of amanirenas is a lost city in the mountains of your sudan. It's still a pretty kickin' place in my timeline. it's called manaris." He pressed a boney finger to the map. "*here."

I marked it on the map. "C? Can you put a modern map over this one?"

"Sure." A hologram of the current topography settled over the map. "There's a... well, I won't call it a road, but a trail that heads to the city from Port Sudan. We could make it up there on a jeep. Fastest way to the trail is by train."

"*do you kids need anything else?"

I picked up the parchment and rolled it up with the map before sealing both in the tube. "We're good. Thanks for the help."

"*sure thing. good luck! i'm rootin' for ya." He disappeared.

There was a sound on the stairs behind us. We turned out our flashlights and backed against the walls, waiting in the dark.

"Are they still here?"

"No one's come out, Sir."

The steps grew closer and two men taller than I came into the room.

"It's dark in here."

"I didn't think that would be a problem for you, Sir."

There was a low chuckled and I tensed. "Oh. It isn't much of a problem at all."

A hand came out of nowhere and grabbed my throat forcing me hard against the wall. I pulled my gun and shot him point blank with the foam core. I couldn't see how far he'd been encased, but it was enough to get him to let go of me. I ducked away and heard a sound that made me shiver. He was tearing the foam core apart. Oh no.

Quick as a snake, he grabbed my jacket and pulled me toward him. I spun, slamming my fist into his jaw. He stumbled away from me. Someone I assumed was Cross bee lined for the man and tackled him to the ground, shoving him into the dirt, and slamming him against the wall. The man's companion ran back up the stairs.

I dashed after him, followed by the rest of the team, and came up into an ambush of uniformed members of the Thule Society. We froze, taking a moment to catch a breath. C laid out escape routes and attack plans in my head as I looked around. I signaled the rest of the group with hand gestures.

The man from the room ascended the stairs. Blonde haired and blue eyed, he wore a dark gray uniform and insignia denoting him as a commander. "Well. That was interesting. I was told that I would be facing a team to recover the Book of Thoth, but I did not expect you to be able to actually fight." He looked at Frisk and I. "Especially with women on your team." He came around to stand in front of Frisk, looking down his nose at her. I wondered what color her eyes where at that moment. Probably red. "So, how will you escape me and my men, hmm?"

I smiled. "Victor. Lima. November."

Cross pulled his gun and fired into the group behind us causing them to scatter. Lyall and Stewart threw down smoke bombs while I grabbed Frisk's arm and we ran behind the scattering men. We headed into the remains of the Roman for and took a sharp right at the corner. I could hear the pounding of feet on the floor behind me and dove for cover when we hit a vestibule in front of a locked door.

Stewart stood over Cross as he picked the lock on the door, providing cover. "Dude! I am still really upset about you killing me. Please don't make me have to protect you!"

The lock popped open. "I've got it. I've got it." Cross pushed the door open. We ran outside and pushed the door shut behind us.

Lyall laughed. "We're in the employee parking lot!" He ran a hand over a vintage muscle car. "Nice."

I nodded. "It's a GMC Sprint."

Stewart looked at me. "That's some serious car knowledge there."

I shrugged. "My husband is really into vintage muscle cars. I can identify them, but not much else."

Cross looked at me. "Is that the manifestation of every Gaster being into that one specific fan thing?"

"Like Dings' Snoopy collection? I think it might be. Quick. Pick a car that will fit all of us. C's already got us a map from here to the train station."

Cross picked a jeep, no surprise, and we were at the train station faster than I expected us to be. Cross bought our tickets while Frisk rounded up some food and bottled water.

Frisk sat next to me on the train, eyes green purple. "Isn't it weird how that guy could see in the dark?"

"Yeah. He knew where I was while I was only landing hits on him based on training."

Stewart scooted over. "Do you think he was using night vision goggles of some sort?"

I shook my head. "Maybe. But I didn't connect with goggles when I hit him and he didn't look like his face was hurt from having his head hit the wall with goggles on."

Cross looked out the window. "Are we on a double track?"

Lyall nodded. "Yeah. We'll be slowing down soon so another train can pass. Why?"

I looked out the window and saw a train going passed us with black suns painted on the cars. "How do they even know where we're heading let alone get their train ahead of ours?"

Frisk pulled me to my feet, eyes red yellow. "We'll figure that out later. Time to jump trains."

We headed to the car coupling and readied ourselves.

"We're starting to slow down," Lyall yelled over the noise. "Put on your goggles and jump for the ladders."

We lined up behind Lyall and made our jumps, each of us landing on a different car. I climbed quickly to the roof and ran forward, heading for my team. The metal roof of the car gave out from under me and I hit the floor of the cargo car.

"Church!" Cross jumped down to me and helped me up. "Are you okay?"

I brushed myself off. "Yeah..." I lifted my head. "What's that noise?"

A large military helicopter with the black sun on the side came into view, blocking the light of the moon.

My jaw dropped.

"Ah... No way!"

I heard the rising squeal of the missile launchers and pulled Cross to the floor of the car. Cross put me underneath him as the missile hit the car wall and ripped right through, going over us and out the other wall. It smashed into the passenger train, knocking it from the rails.

"No!"

"Come on, Church! We need to move!" Cross pulled me to my feet and we ran for the end of the car, heading forward.

The rising whine came again and we jumped to an open flatbed car. The next missile hit the bed of the car behind us and disconnected it from the rest of the train. We ran for the passenger car ahead of us and found the rest of the team being held at bay by lots of gun fire.

Frisk looked at Cross, eyes red. "Remember when you asked me what the most bad ass thing I'd ever done was?"

Cross nodded. "Yeah?"

"It was a one woman assault on a train filled with enemies and I had to get another Viper from the front car." Frisk lifted her handgun. "It went something like this." She hid behind the outside wall of the car and fired blindly at the oncoming members of the Thule Society, aiming only with her hearing. The five men keeping us pinned down were all suddenly encased in foam core. She put up the gun and pulled her rifle from her back.

I heard the whine again and Frisk turned. Aiming carefully, she fired at the helicopter's blades, killing the mechanism with foam core. The helicopter fell out of the sky and slammed into the ground a quarter mile from the tracks.

Frisk looked at Cross. "It was also the stupidest thing I've ever done!" She reloaded and we moved forward.

Something caught Stewart's eye and he motioned us over. "Look at this."

People were jumping from the train enmass. The faces I could see looked terrified. I looked down the track and saw nothing but more track.

"What the hell?"

The entire front of the train car burst open and we all ducked the flying debris. The man in the gray suit stood there with blood splattered on his uniform and a mouth full of dripping gore. He strode into the train car. "Well, it seems that this needs a more personal touch."

Lyall jumped at him, sprouting fur. Grabbing the man by his clothing, he slammed him into the floor. Picking up a piece of wood debris, Lyall staked the man through the heart. The man hissed as his skin grew taught, eyes melting, and finally turning to dust.

"I thought I smelled vampire!"

"Vampires?!" Stewart yelled. "There are fucking vampires here?!"

Cross looked at me. "That would have been good information to know, Church."

"Don't look at me! I didn't know vampires actually existed in my timeline!"

Frisk tapped my shoulder, eyes orange blue. "We can talk about that later. We have incoming."

I looked up to see several outrageously large bats flying right for us. "What do we do, Lyall?"

He looked around for a half second. "We run for the engine. It'll be easier to pick them off if they have to fly after us instead of us racing toward them."

We ran for engine at the front of the train, dodging grabbing claws. One of the bats grabbed Frisk, lifting her into the air. She fired her rifle into it's face. Lyall jumped from the train to catch her, rolling to cover her as they hit the ground.

They came up waving us on.

Frisk's voice came over my comm. "Keep going! We'll meet you at Port Sudan."

"Got it."

"What do we do?" Stewart asked.

"We keep going," I said.

"You don't split the party," Cross gritted out.

"Yes. I know I'll regret it later. Let's get to the engine!" We pushed our way through. There wasn't an engineer in the small room. Only a corpse drained of blood.

"Crap," Stewart groaned. He pulled the corpse away from the machinery. "Anyone know how to drive this thing?"

"Yeah." Cross stepped up. "If it can be driven, piloted, or sailed, I can handle it."

Stewart reloaded his gun. "Great. Get us to Port Sudan in one piece and we'll keep the vampires away."

"How long till morning?" I asked.

Stewart shot a massive bat in the face. "Why does that matter?"

I took out a massive bat to the right. "Vampires plus sunlight equals a bad time for them."

"Oh."

Cross pointed toward the mountains and the pink tinged sky. "We don't have a long wait."

The vampires seemed to notice the rising sun and broke off. Soon we were alone on the train. As we got closer to the station, Cross slowed the train and pulled us onto a secondary track. We came to a halt and hoofed it to the station through the growing dawn.

I yawned. Then Stewart yawned. And then Cross yawned.

Cross blinked. "That's not good. Now would not be the best time to go to sleep. Right now we have a head start for the lost city. We'll lose it if we hit the hay."

I shook my head. "It can't be helped. We'll find a place to nap for the morning and then head out in the afternoon."

We sat on a bench outside the train station.

My comm buzzed and Lyall's voice came over. "We are way too tired to make it to the station. We're just outside of Port Sudan so we'll find a place to nap and meet you on the trail up to the lost city. According to C's map, Provost and I aren't that far from the trail."

"That sounds like a plan." I looked at Cross and Stewart. "Let's go find some beds."

We checked into separate rooms in the Baasher Palace Hotel. After a quick shower, I set the alarm for noon and fell into the bed.

When I woke up, it was dark. Crap.

I sat up and immediately banged my forehead off the box I was in. I took a deep breath and willed myself not to panic.

"C?" I whispered, trembling.

I could see him behind my eyes, sighing in relief. He sat cross legged on the floor in the cabin in my head. "You're finally awake. Thank goodness."

"What happened?"

"Five men came into the room. When I possessed you to get away, they over powered us. One of them damaged my A.I. chip, so right now, I'm just down to being a second soul living in your body. They put us in a crate, but I don't know where we're going. They took your weapons, but they did drop the tube with the map in here with us, so I doubt they intend to bury us or dump us somewhere. If it gets to be too long, we'll just access your save and start from scratch."

I nodded and did my best to relax.

"I'm sorry. I should have just woken you."

"It's okay, C. We've been in tight spots before."

"I still feel bad."

I smiled. "No worries, Chara. No worries."

I felt the box jostle like it was being set down. Two crowbars wedged into the top and lid popped open. Frisk and Lyall stood over me.

"Oh thank goodness! You're all right!" Frisk said, eyes blue pink. She hugged me as I sat up.

"Not exactly. The guys who shoved me in the box damaged C. Our comms are down."

Lyall shook his head. "I wondered why we couldn't reach you, Stewart, or Cross."

Frisk gripped my hand, eyes blue green. "Is your Chara all right?"

I felt the strange tingle that preceded Chara's possession of my body. His voice tumbled from my mouth. "I'm okay. Just lacking my wi-fi."

I shivered a little and shook him out of place. He laughed at me behind my eyes and I smiled. "Jerk."

He winked.

"What about Cross and Stewart? And where are we?"

Lyall frowned. "We're in a Thule Society base. Stewart's somewhere in one of these crates. Cross was taken somewhere else."

"Let's start popping open some crates then." Frisk handed me a crowbar as I climbed out of my crate. I followed them and we started busting open crates. We found bags of blood stolen from the Red Cross, Thule Society uniforms, a hundred copies of the E.T. video game, one monkey's paw, and DVDs of Twilight.

Lyall opened a crate filled with CDs that might have been different albums at some point, but were now all the 'Best of Queen.' "What the actual fuck?"

I stared in the crate. "I have no idea."

Frisk popped open a crate and found Stewart passed out inside. I dug through a Red Cross crate and found smelling salts. I pocketed a few before breaking an ampule open and waving it under Stewart's nose.

He coughed and sat up, looking around. "What happened?"

"We were kidnapped."

He sighed and climbed out of the crate. He looked around. "Where's Cross?"

"They took him."

Stewart brushed himself off. "Then let's go save his sorry ass."

We headed into the rest of the base, checking each room as we went.

"It's really quiet in here," Stewart whispered.

"What time is it?" I asked quietly.

Lyall checked his phone. "After sunset."

I stopped at a door, listening to stuttered breathing. Frisk handed me her kit and I picked the door's lock. Inside, Cross sat unconscious, tied to a chair, and didn't look to be in good shape. "Spider cider please." I popped a smelling salt under his nose and he jerked awake. "Careful." I put my hand on the side of his face as Lyall handed me his thermos of cider. I helped him drink a bit and his bruises cleared up. I checked his neck for bite marks and found none.

Stewart grimaced. "Shit. You were completely worked over."

Cross shrugged. "Comes with territory."

"Why'd they grab you?"

"They think I'm running this shindig."

We all laughed.

"Oh my God. If there's anything I would not trust you to do," Stewart snorted.

Cross shrugged again and let himself out of the ropes. He stood and popped his arm back into the socket. "They must have some other source of information on the location of the Book because they know exactly where Manaris is located. The vampire leaders of the Society are already on their way with some 'snacks.' We need to hurry." He looked at me. "Are you okay? I tried comming you with no response."

"C's A.I. interface is damaged. He's okay, but our comms our down."

He nodded. "I was awake when they brought me in. They stashed the gear we brought with us in a room just off the entrance."

Lyall nodded. "Then let's collect our things and get up that trail."

After finding our things, we headed out side to find a complete lack of vehicles.

I sighed. "Looks like we have to hoof it."

"Do we have enough time for that?" Lyall asked.

"Provided they have to sort their way through puzzles, we've got time." I shouldered my pack.

C knocked on my mind, speaking to my brain directly rather than through my ear. "Hey, Frisk. I figured out a short cut from the map. I can lead you."

I nodded. "C's figured out a short cut. Follow us."

We ran part way up the trail before C led us off of it. After a kilometer of fighting overgrowth, we found a set of overgrown stone steps up the side of the mountain.

Stewart smiled. "Way to go, C!"

At the top of the stairs, we stepped onto a large stone bridge that glowed softly in the moonlight. At the end of the bridge was a massive stone gate covered in carvings of flowers and vines. We through grappling hooks and climbed up and over the gate rather than risk a noisy opening. The city on the other side of the gate was breathtaking. Beautiful stone buildings sat on an island in the middle of a long dry lake. Several arched bridges from several different gates soared majestically over the long lost lake to the central part of the city. Long abandoned homes carved of the same stone lined the interior walls of the gate. Whatever was not covered in foliage was carved with the same carved flowers and vines of the exterior gate and glowed the same way in the moonlight. In the center of the island city stood a temple reaching like two hands in prayer toward the sky.

"Woah," Frisk breathed, eyes a rainbow wash.

"Yeah," I echoed.

Cross pointed. "The Thule Society is over there."

We all watched the Society hurry along a bridge below ours toward the city center. We ducked low and snuck along the bridge, hidden from sight. A door with a great maned lion over it greeted us and we entered the temple. Inside, large braziers were lit, illuminating the entire interior. The stairs from our doorway had fallen away. I turned and dropped down, climbing along the lost ledges to the floor below.

Cross smiled as he followed me. "What did I say? Totally Uncharted," he whispered.

"Yeah. Except none of us knows ancient languages," I gritted out just in time to slip and scramble to find another hand hold. I breathed a sigh of relief when I caught myself.

"You okay, Church?"

"Yeah." I climbed the rest of the way down and snuck over to the edge of a balcony while I waited for the others. I looked over the edge and saw a large circular area, open to the sky. The full moon's light was close to hitting the area dead on. The Society roamed around the circle looking for something.

I moved away from the edge and pulled out my files, sitting on the stone floor.

Stewart sat next to me. "So I've got a question. Legit one this time. Who lights all the fires in these places? I know it's a big video game convention that there's always enough light, but this is weird and it means someone is still in the city."

Lyall and Frisk nodded. "Agreed."

I sighed. "Then we'll need to be extra careful." I looked down at the papers. "There's nothing in the files to indicate where the Book might be hidden or any clues at all."

Cross elbowed me. "Come on. You're the investigator. Start looking at this like it's an investigation."

I took a breath and looked around. All the flower carvings were of the same flower. "That's a moon flower in the carvings. It only blooms at night." I scooted over and looked over the edge. "In the center of the circle down their is a huge moon flower carving. I bet when the moonlight hits it full on, it will open."

Frisk looked over the edge, eyes purple blue. "There isn't a lot of time until then."

Lyall helped us to our feet. "Stairs this way."

We hurried down to the bottom and hid behind the pillars lining the exterior wall just as the moonlight hit the circle dead on. There was a sudden shaking and I leaned against the pillar to brace myself. Several of the human members of the Society fell inside the mechanism opening the floor, screaming as they were caught in gears while the vampires simply leaped out of the way. One scream made me cringe and the mechanism stopped moving. Someone's body was caught inside the gears and it was slowly tearing him apart. There was a visceral sound and the screaming stopped. The mechanism lifted up a golden case on a pedestal, forming a blood covered stairway to it.

The blonde haired, blue eyed vampire I was sure we'd killed sauntered up the stairs, stopping only to kick a severed hand out of the way. He opened the case to reveal, not a book, but a papyrus scroll. He touched it and screamed in pain as his hand caught fire.

A screech like a bird sounded over us. The flowering vines covering the circular walls leading up to the roof parted and several griffins, red and gold in the firelight descended.

"UNWORTHY! UNWORTHY!"

We stayed behind the pillars as the griffins tore at the vampires with razor sharp claws, reducing them to bloody shreds that turned to ash.

The blonde vampire laughed even as the fire consumed him, grabbing the scroll and holding it close. "It's mine! The power of a god is mine!" He opened the scroll only to have it crumble into nothing. "No! NO!" The fire consuming him flashed brightly and I covered my eyes. When I was able to see again, the vampires where gone. The scroll was back in the gold case and griffins stood in a line together waiting for us.

I took a deep breath and stepped out, the others following.

"Are you worthy, human?"

I shook my head. "It doesn't matter if I am or not. We're only here to stop the people you've taken care off. Though, we thought we'd killed the blonde vampire before."

Lyall sighed. "That's my fault. I didn't scatter his ashes like I should have. That would have prevented the resurrection."

The lead griffin stepped forward. "You do not want the scroll?"

"No. I originally thought to take it for safe keeping, but you appear to have this under control."

The griffin strode up to me, feathers gleaming red and gold in the fire light. He raised a claw and ripped away the sleeve covering my left arm to reveal my tattoo, the Delta Rune that marked my kinship to Asriel. "The Dreemurr family yet lives. Take the scroll and give it to King Asgore."

"King Asgore is retired. His son Asriel is now on the throne."

"Then take it and give it to him."

Everyone looked at me and I shrugged. Climbing the steps, I reached in the case and touched the scroll. Nothing happened. I pulled the scroll out and opened it. The papyrus appeared to be blank. Rolling it back up, I put it in the tube and descended the stairs. The moonlight moved away from the circle and the mechanism reversed, returning the gold case to the darkness.

"Are you monsters who avoided the sealing in the underground?" I looked to the griffins only to find them gone.

Frisk put an arm around me, eyes green pink. "Ready to go?"

I looked around. "Yeah." I looked at the rest of the team. "This is going to be fun to explain to my CO."

"About that. How much is he paying?" Lyall asked.

I smiled. "One million American a piece."

We walked out the way the Society had come in and found a few jeeps waiting. I turned to look back at the city one last time and watched the gates close.


	6. Ep 6 - Chara and the Jungles of Trul

Core Issues: Season Three  
by Nicolle

Disclaimer: Undertale belongs to Toby Fox. G!Sans (our narrator) and G!Paps belong to Borurou. Fase is from Technotale. Underfell is a community project. Shipworks is one of my AUs. This story is copyright to me.

Special Disclaimer:

1\. I saw an anon request for Steam/Shipworks Sans. And after two minutes of punching around on a steampunk site, I was pretty darn inspired to write a Shipworks story.

2\. Rated T for language, sexual themes/jokes, and violence.

Ep. 6. - Chara Dreemurr and the Jungles of Trul  
(Shipworks Chara is our narrator!)

Greeeeeeeeaaaaaat. I'm in my _faaaaaaaaavorite_ place. I just love being tied up and hanging by my wrists over a jungle river filled with piranha that can skeletonize a grown man in less than a minute.

Wait. Let me back up a bit and tell you how I ended up in this mess.

It started with the launch of Dr. Gaster's new luxury liner airship, _Jubilation_. Asriel wanted to be on the maiden voyage and who are we to say no to her? I mean, it's not like it would be dangerous for the Princess of All Monsters to go on a airship cruise over a jungle filled with a known guerrilla group attempting to seal monsters back underground if not eradicate them all together. That's not dangerous at all.

Full disclosure: I am well aware that I can't say no to her. Ever.

That doesn't mean Dr. Gaster, Sans, or my brother can't.

Why am I including my brother in that statement? He's worse than I am for _different_ reasons.

Anyway, somewhere over the Trul Jungle, the ship went down. Whether it was sabotaged from the inside or shot down from the jungle, we have no idea. But the news of it going down hit us before it went public giving Sans, Frisk, and I enough time to get our butts in gear and get over to the jungle. We'd hoped that Az would be waiting at the wreckage with other passengers. Instead, everyone on the ship was gone and the aforementioned guerrilla group, the 'Lawful Privilege League,' was waiting for us instead.

So, here we are, hanging over a river of man eating piranha, waiting for the tree branch to finally give out and dump us in.

"Well," my brother started, "that happened."

"Where the hell is Sans? No, wait. I know that answer to that question. He's napping."

Frisk rolled his red eyes. "Oh come on, Chara. He's not that bad."

I glared at him and got a sheepish smile in return. I looked around. The river bank wasn't that far from us. "Let's try swinging the branch and see if we can get it to snap over the bank."

Frisk sucked in a breath through a grimace. "I'd rather wait for Sans. We are completely tied up so we might avoid the piranha's only to get eaten by the alligators."

There was a resounding crack and we bounced toward the river. "We don't have time to wait!"

"All right! All right! Swing on three! One, Two, Thr-!"

The branch snapped and we plummeted for the river. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and waited for the immersion. It didn't come. I opened my eyes. We were hovering over the water, surrounded by blue magic.

Sans, in his khaki explorer's gear complete with pith helmet and leather backpack, stood on the bank with his hands in the pockets of his pants. "*nice of you boys to drop in!"

I groaned while my brother laughed.

"What took you so long?!"

"*well, escaping a bunch of people who are trying to figure out how to kill a skeleton is very entertaining. besides, you're both just fine."

I glared at the smiley trashbag. "Can you just put us down? On the river bank preferably."

He dropped us on the bank. My arms finally down, I reached for my knife and cut the ropes off myself before getting Frisk loose.

"Did you at least manage to get something out of those idiot Leaguers before you escaped?"

Sans shook his head. "*they say they shot down the ship, but they didn't have anything like the necessary equipment to do so. no one was at the ship when they got there. i did manage to pick up the trail of the ship's passengers."

"And they were being lead by someone with big feet?" Frisk asked.

Sans nodded. I frowned and checked my gear. The Leaguers hadn't bothered to take our stuff, marking us as 'kids' and not anyone particularly special despite having been with Sans. It was strange that, despite how often I saw Frisk and myself on a poster or portrait of the royal family, or was credited with some new invention I'd been working on, I was still regarded as a street rat. It was an attitude that had it's advantages, such as now, but had long become tiresome. I guess when you start in the gutter, it doesn't matter how much your life improves afterward. You're still just trash. It never seems to bother Frisk so I don't complain about it.

Pointing out the obvious only led to arguments and I didn't like fighting with my brother.

I shouldered my backpack and motioned to Sans to lead the way. My brother and I walked side by side in matching white button down shirts, leather vests, brown pants with pale stripes the long way, and black ties. Since our adoption, Mom enjoyed dressing us in matching clothing. Apparently, it was something that parents did with sets of twins. No one had done that for us at the orphanage. There it'd been about wearing whatever fit and wasn't falling off of you. Sometimes I wondered if our biological mother thought of dressing us this way before she abandoned us.

The jungle was thick with greenery and large red flowers. We pushed through the heavy foliage only to stop at a drop into an open canyon surrounded by beautiful waterfalls. A fine mist came up from the canyon floor, filling the sky with a dense, white fog.

Frisk frowned. "Where did they go from here? The tracks end here."

"Az knows fire magic and a bunch of really specialized spells, but not anything to do with flight. So, look over the edge?"

Frisk knelt and looked over the edge. "Well done, Chara! There's a wide ledge about eight feet down and a path into the canyon. It's really muddy from people walking on it."

"*i'll lower us down."

Frisk smiled, face as cheery as his bleach blonde hair with pink tips. Sometimes, I thought my brother looked like a flower with that hair. "Thanks, Sans!"

A bit of blue magic had us traveling down the path quickly. The lower we went, the more the mist became spray. I pulled my bag off my shoulder and turned the nob from jungle proof to water proof. The fabric took on a bright sheen and water droplets slid right off of it. Too bad I couldn't do the same thing with my clothes, my shirt was already sticking to me something fierce.

Sans halted us in front of a strange stone pillar with unusual carvings. He took a moment to jot down notes about it while Frisk and I looked around the path to see which way the group went.

Frisk frowned. "Why did they leave the wreck site?"

"Probably to avoid the Leaguers." I looked at the pillar. "What's so interesting about this?"

"*the symbols are wrong. this is south america and the symbols here are viking."

"A mystery for another time," I sighed. I looked around. "Where's my brother? Frisk!"

His head popped out of the foliage with a big smile one his face. Now he really looked like a flower. I should start calling him 'Flowey.'

"Found the trail!"

Sans and I followed him into a hidden cave. Sans sent a line of glowing bones ahead of us to illuminate the darkness. The walls were covered with paintings of Egyptian gods and goddesses. As we walked, the paintings changed to Mayan carvings, and then ancient Greek carvings. Sans stopped for a moment to jot down what he saw.

Frisk turned a full circle on his heel. "What is this?"

"*good question. i'm not sure and i'm worried that it will mean problems for us later."

I shined my crystal light torch along the walls. "This kind of thing always means problems for us later." I turned my light to the cave floor. "The trail's gone."

Sans frowned. "*something's up, boys. we'll back track to see were we lost them. see if we missed a turn."

We back tracked to the beginning of the cave and found the trail completely gone.

"What the...?" I exhaled sharply, and resisted the urge to tap my foot.

Frisk put a hand on my shoulder, his go to method for calming me when he thought I was getting angry. He was pretty spot on for that sort of thing. "Let's go back in and through the cave."

I nodded. Sans and I followed him. The paintings and carvings inside the cave were gone. Frisk grabbed my hand, squeezing it as we walked through. The cave curved to the right, going up, and we hit a dead end. We turned around and headed back the way we came only to hit another dead end. Frisk gripped my hand tightly, shaking.

Sans put his boney arms around us and short cut us to the cave entrance and next to the Viking pillar. He frowned at it. "*i'm translating this before we try again." He pulled out his notebook and compared the runes.

"What does it say?"

"*randolph carter was here."

I huffed, head dropping.

My brother's head fell back. "I'm just spit balling here, but what if the Leaguers didn't pull the ship down. What if someone on the ship worshiped one of the Elder Gods and brought the ship down to lead a bunch of sacrifices to their doom?"

I opened my mouth to disagree, thought better of it, and simply nodded in agreement. Every time my brother started a sentence with "I'm just spit balling here" he was usually right. And if not spot on, he usually hit on the right point. "Then we need to find Az quick."

Sans frowned and looked around the entire canyon. "*i think the cave may have been a trick. that if they went that way, it was with a guide." He pulled out a map. "*let's try one of Papyrus' new inventions."

Laying the map flat on the ground, he set a small brass box with a button in the middle. He pressed the button and the box unfolded itself into a little clockwork bug with a crystal case on the top. He held out a boney hand toward me.

"What?"

"*come on, chara. i know you keep a lock of her hair on you. i need a strand."

I sighed and lifted the golden, heart shaped locket with pictures of my brother and Az hidden under my button down. Careful not to unravel the braid of white hair, I pulled a strand for Sans. He dropped it into the crystal case as I closed the locket and hid it away again. The crystal case glittered as the little clockwork bug crawled around the map, tiny brass legs skittering this way and that. It stopped over a part of the map, long pointed nose down on a particular spot. Sans pulled out his note pad and made the calculations for a short cut.

He pressed the crystal top of the clockwork bug and it folded back in on itself becoming a box again. Frisk put an arm around my shoulders as Sans pocketed his brother's invention and rolled up the scroll. He put a boney hand on my brother's shoulder and we short cut to the outskirts of a small village of brick houses with A frame roofs. We hid in among the trees, scoping out the village before heading in.

The villagers went about their daily lives, but a mass of foot prints indicated that the crash survivors were in the house guarded by two stout warriors. I tapped Frisk on the shoulder and nodded for him to follow me. Sans stayed put while my brother and I circled around the village to the back of the house. Before we could start pulling the bricks away from the wall, a space in the brickwork opened up from the inside.

Asriel caught a glimpse of us through the hole and smiled. I motioned for her to keep quiet only to have her roll her eyes in that amused way that was as beautiful as it was infuriating. She and Wilson, one of her human guards, worked quietly to remove bricks from the inside while my brother and I worked from the outside. Just as we had the hole wide enough that Az could get through, I was bodily lifted into the air. I fought against what I thought was someone grabbing me until I realized I was just hanging in the air.

A tall woman in long, wine purple dreadlocks, a rose patterned skirt, and black velvet jacket held us aloft with magic. Her face painted with white stripes across her nose and black dots between the stripes, she looked up at us with a smile. "How interesting! Is this all the Dreemurr family can do? Send children to rescue their beloved daughter? Still, you're both able bodied. You'll fetch a good price as slaves to the Men of Leng."

Men of Leng, huh? What did I tell you about my brother being right?

I looked at Frisk and he looked just as worried. Hopefully Sans was still hiding outside the village. The woman pulled a pair of syringes from the black leather utility belt she wore. I immediately started struggling, desperately fighting to get away. I was beginning to hyperventilate and I didn't care. Anything but an injection. _Anything_.

A knife flew through the air, knocking the syringes from her hands, and shattering them against the ground. Wilson leaped from the hole and stood between us and the woman. Rather than give her time to cast another spell, Wilson rushed her, slamming her into the tree behind her. Villagers were gathering around us now. Asriel jumped down, landing in front of us.

She lifted a hand. "Star Blazing!"

Large stars rained down, breaking into smaller stars to cover the villagers. Frisk pulled me against the brick wall and Az stepped in front to shield us. I looked through the hole in the wall and saw Sans evacuating the other passengers out the front door of the house. Within a few moments, the villagers lay unconscious.

Az turned and looked at us with a smile. "Thank you for coming."

I sighed. "Why didn't you stay with the ship?"

She pursed her lips. "We had no choice. The Leaguers were approaching and I couldn't use my magic without hurting everyone. It was easier to run."

"Only to get caught by someone else."

"Tone, Chara."

I glared and only received another smile in return.

Frisk put his arms around us. "Come on, you two. We need to get out of here."

We walked around the house, Wilson watching our backs, to find the other passengers staring into the sky. A large, black sailed airship was descending.

All three of us groaned. "Oh no."

Satyr men, some in long robes and turbans to cover their horns, others naked with brown furred legs, descended from the ship. The Men of Leng.

"*time to beat a quick retreat kids."

Frisk and I looked between the Men of Leng and the passengers. I pulled my sword from it's sheath hidden against my back, activating it's electrical current. Frisk pulled his ray gun.

"We've got this!" Frisk yelled with a smile.

"Get the passengers to safety!"

Sans nodded and led the passengers away. Az stepped up with us.

"You go too, Az."

Asriel sighed. Not her princess sigh, but her leader sigh. She summoned her Chaos Saber. "Let's take care of them before Wilson realizes that I'm not with him."

Frisk and I smiled, falling in with her.

Two dozen of the satyrs hit the ground, heading for us.

"That's a lot," Frisk muttered.

"I'll clear the field." She lifted her hand and summoned lightning. Seven bolts hit the ground, knocking their forces down by half. I caught the first of the satyrs to reach us in the chest, the current in my blade sending him in an arc back toward his kind. The next was taken out by the ice setting on Frisk's ray gun.

The next one to reach me was a bit savvier than his friend, but not by much. He used his sword to block mine and was electrocuted as the current went down his blade to his hand. Az cut the next one in half.

One of the robed Men of Leng raised his hand, calling for his people to halt. He pointed at Asriel. "You and your men have great courage and great power to stand against us! Sell me your men and I will pay most handsomely!"

Frisk's shoulders dropped. He stared at his feet, ready to be abandoned again. Oh, Frisk. That... That was my fault. I was his rock and I'd left him. No one had wanted to adopt me and the orphanage wouldn't split us when someone expressed interest in Frisk. I'd gone up Mt. Ebott hoping to free him of my dead weight and, instead, I'd left him a wreck.

Asriel's eyes turned black with rage. " _How dare you speak like that to my royal brothers!_ " The Chaos Saber disappeared and the fire magic she loosed ripped through them. All that was left when the flames disappeared where smoldering corpses. Az inhaled deeply and let it out slowly, willing herself to stop shaking. She put her arms around Frisk as the remaining Men of Leng on the ship turned tail and ran. "I love you. So does mom and dad. We would never give you up. Ever. Promise."

I put my arm around my brother's shoulders. "Come on. Let's go find everyone else and figure out how to get home."

We turned around to find a very angry Wilson waiting for us. "How am I supposed to protect any of the three of you if you run head long into danger?"

Az lifted her hands in surrender, giving her best sheepish smile. "I apologize for being so rash-"

Wilson raised an eyebrow. "Drop it, Your Highness. I've heard it a thousand times before. I am immune." He pointed at my brother and I. "And you two! The entire royal guard would appreciate a head's up when you trek off somewhere so at least one of us can be with you. We could really use a few more people right now."

"Sorry, Sir Wilson."

I frowned. "Sorry."

He blinked, surprised at my apology. Then again, I didn't give them often.

We followed him to a small opening in the jungle where the passengers were waiting with Sans. Taking the lead, the Bag of Bones led us back to the downed airship. He stopped us before we entered the area, checking on the Leaguers. He came back and waved us on. The Leaguers looked to have abandoned the wreck.

Now that terrorists weren't crawling all over the place, I could see the damage. The _Jubilation_ floated in the middle of a lake. The damage to the outside was caused by the crash, but it wasn't even close to enough to bring down a Shipworks creation. No signs of why it went down in the first place were apparent. I looked to my brother.

Frisk was already handing his gear to Sans to swim for the ship. I followed suit and handed Asriel my things. She shouldered my pack.

"How impertinent! Young man! You do not just hand your things to a princess to hold!"

Young man, huh? At least she wasn't calling me a child. Or a rat. I ignored the woman and pulled my locket over my head.

Wilson didn't. "You will not speak to His Royal Highness Prince Chara like that again or you will be left in the jungle."

A murmur went up among the passengers, several of them suddenly trying to get a good look at Frisk and I. I sighed, not really sure how I felt about anyone using my title. Or about someone defending it. I clasped my locket around Az's neck while attempting to hide the red on my cheeks. That she smiled at me only made it worse.

I frowned, trying to pass off my blush as consternation. "Any idea what made the ship go down in the first place?"

Asriel shook her head. "It was a slow descent, which is why the rest of the passengers are fine. But the crew..." She frowned.

I nodded.

She leaned in the whisper. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine."

"Would you like a kiss?"

My face was red as a tomato, it had to be. She smiled at my expression and kissed my cheek, before gently pushing me toward Frisk. I pulled my goggles down, flipped the lenses to water, and had a look at the lake. It was deep, but seemed devoid of dangerous fish. Frisk and I dived in, swimming underneath the ship to the emergency hatch. Finding it intact, we came up for air, and dove again to open it.

Something grabbed my leg.

Before I could signal Frisk that something was wrong, I was jerked into the darkness. My lungs gave out and I fought not to breath in water. Everything went dark.

I came to in a surprisingly cozy bunk. Well, it would have been cozy had I not been tied up as well. I was in a ship of some sort with a cylindrical interior in a homey wood brown. The metal skeleton of the interior had been painted orange. A man I didn't recognize stood when I looked at him. He wore a red and white striped button down under a black vest and pants. A black leather duster covered the otherwise obvious metal left arm.

"What is your interest in the _Jubilation,_ boy?"

Back to being a kid again. "It's a Shipworks creation and I work for Dr. Gaster. What else would I be interested in?"

"You work for the Doctor? I doubt that. You aren't a monster."

I rolled my eyes and laid back, staring at the top of the bunk. "So what's your interest in the ship?"

He paced back and forth in front of the bunk. "I was promised a handsome amount for the theft of the ship. My partner was to disable the crew and lead the passengers away to be sold to the Men of Leng while I secured the ship. If I hadn't been so busy chasing off the Leaguers, I would be gone by now." He eyed me for a moment. "So how much were you offered to steal the ship? Ten grand? Twenty? Your clothing looks nice but even a street rat can dress itself so I doubt you know how to negotiate a real deal."

I stared up and said nothing. Didn't I say my brother would be right?

"Look. You're able bodied at the very least. Help me steal the ship and I'll give you whatever small amount you were offered plus a meal."

Did I really looked like I could be bought for so little? Or simply on my stomach? What was it about Frisk and I that always made us less than common? Whatever. This wasn't a hard part to play. "I was offered fifteen hundred."

"Well, I suppose that does sound like a lot to someone with very little. Done then!" He untied me and shook my hand. "I am Leonard Bardin Flood. This is my ship, the _Curio_. And you are?"

"Chara."

"No last name?"

Dreemurr. My last name is Dreemurr. "I was abandoned at an orphanage."

"Ah."

"Where is your crew?"

"The _Curio_ is self maintaining. I need only direct it."

I fought to keep the look on my face dull and uninterested. But damn! Self maintaining? If I could get my hands on this ship, Papyrus and I would be busy for months working out the functions. I followed Flood to the bridge. A very large and very thick piece of the glass covered the end of the ship, allowing for a clear view of the lake. I could see the _Jubilation_ above us. The emergency hatch was open.

"It seems someone is already inside."

Not likely. When Frisk thinks I'm in trouble he goes directly to Sans for help.

"I will align us underneath the hatch so you can climb up into it."

I nodded. "What's the plan from there?"

"Get the ship air born. We will attach cables between the two ships and tow it away."

I blinked as realization dawned on me. Flood didn't know what he was doing. That's why he had a self maintaining ship. That's why he asked me to join him. He was out of his league without his partner and hoping I, since he caught me trying to 'steal' the _Jubilation_ , could handle piloting the ship.

"What happened to your partner?"

Flood shook his head. "I don't know. He was on the ship when it came down."

I nodded. "Can I have my goggles back?"

He dug around in his pockets before handing them to me. "How did you afford these?"

I looked the goggles over, cleaned them, put them on, and climbed the ladder to the hatch. "I made them."

Flood laughed like it was the best joke he'd heard in ages. How could someone believe I was capable of flying a complicated piece of machinery but laugh at the idea that I would make my own goggles? He probably thought I stole them. I sighed.

When the ships were properly aligned, I popped the hatch and climbed into the _Jubilation_. The lights were still on. My brother's wet foot prints circled the opening but went nowhere else. He'd gone back out to look for me. I took a breath and looked down the hall. If I knew my brother, he was losing it right now. The same way he lost it years ago and when I walked up a mountain intending to die.

I shut the emergency hatch and I ran for the bridge. I opened the door to the bridge with the emergency code and found the crew several degrees of dead. I gagged on the fetid air. I covered my mouth and nose with the collar of my shirt and shoved a few windows open. Moving the body from the control panel, I looked over the read out. The ship had been set to emergency landing, which explained the gentle set down on a jungle lake. I looked around at the uniformed dead. They all looked to have gagged to death. They'd been gassed.

I still didn't know who Flood's partner was. If I was lucky, the crew threw him overboard before they died. Not taking any chances, I popped the cabinet with emergency supplies and put on a gas mask. I hooked a second to my belt for my brother. Better safe than sorry.

Checking the control panel one last time, I flipped a few switches and moved the ship closer to the lake's edge. I looked out the window and cut the power just as soon as I was sure we were close enough for the boarding plank to go down and lowered it. I heard voices coming down the hall to the bridge, a bunch of Leaguers coming this way. They hadn't abandoned the ship. They'd simply hid and waited. I slammed the emergency close button and the door to the bridge sealed.

There was banging on the door. "Open up, boy! Do it willingly and we won't hurt you! We only want the monster. Just tell us were it is!"

I ran back to the emergency cabinet and opened the back compartment. Inside was a replica of my electrical current sword. I pulled it out and disconnected the electrical system from the blade. I attached it to the door and waited until I could hear multiple people against the door.

"Long Live King Asgore!" I turned up the current and listened to a few people scream.

I left the current run and grabbed a signal flare from the cabinet. I set it off and waved it from a window, hoping Frisk, Sans, Asriel, or anyone from the ship really, saw it. The crystal powering the magical electrical current to the door overloaded and cracked. The door lock smashed. I grabbed an ice ray rifle from the cabinet and covered myself behind the captain's chair. The door burst from it's hinges and I fired into the open doorway. The rifle's barrel iced over and shattered. I dropped it to protect my face with my arms.

When I dropped my arms, I stared open mouthed at the hallway. The Leaguers that I hadn't managed to take out where trapped by a mass of bones. Sans stood over them with his usual smile plastered across his skull.

"*hey, kiddo. thanks for lowering the gang plank. what happened to you? your brother's messed up something fierce."

"Some guy named Leonard Bardin Flood grabbed me. He and his partner were trying to steal the ship and sell the passengers to the Men of Leng. The partner disappeared, so he 'recruited' me in exchange for a meal."

Sans raised a brow bone. "*flood, huh?" He frowned. "*why is it that humans always seem to think you and your brother are less than acceptable society? you have better vocabulary and manners than most."

I frowned. I wasn't used to getting a compliment from Sans so I wasn't sure how to respond to it. I decided to ignore it and move to the immediate situation. "I can get the ship flying again. But we need to move the bodies from the bridge first." I sighed. "Will you take me to Frisk please?"

Sans held out a boney hand and short cut us to the jungle. Frisk sat on the ground with his knees up, holding his head. Asriel paced back and forth, one hand clasped tightly around my locket. Frisk saw me first and let out a cry before hugging me something fierce.

Asriel reached back to unclasp the locket. She put it around my neck. "Right where it belongs." She hugged me then and, just for a moment, I let my face rest against the soft fur of her neck and breathed in her soft scent. When I looked up, their was something of dismay in the looks of the ship's passengers.

Wilson was visibly relieved. "What happened, Chara?"

"A guy named Leonard Bardin Flood nabbed me. He's here to steal the _Jubilation_. His partner is a cultist who was going to sell the passengers to the Men of Leng."

Frisk grabbed my shoulders. "How did you get away?"

"He mistook me for a common thief and offered me a meal in exchange for helping him."

Asriel's mouth turned down. She had already hit her tolerance for people insulting Frisk and I today, so I moved the conversation along.

"There are still Leaguers on the ship. We need to clear them out. After that, the ship is still serviceable. We can get everyone back home." I handed Frisk the extra gas mask. "The cultist used a gas to kill the bridge crew. Put that on."

Frisk nodded and put on the mask. He hugged me again. I held him, letting him sink into me, before pulling him back to the ship.

Wilson grabbed my arm. "I am not letting you two walk into danger again." He turned to Sans. "Come on, let's go finish this up." They headed up the gangplank and into the ship.

I pulled out my pocket watch and checked the time before sitting down next to Frisk. And we waited. Asriel pulled out a book and read to the children who waited with their parents. Several of the passengers milled about quietly. Others watched Frisk and I. Trying to make out if we really were princes I suppose.

"How long has it been?" Frisk asked, watching the ship.

I checked my watch. "An hour."

He stood. "Let's go."

Asriel frowned and stood. She pulled the both of us close, heads together in what mom called our 'Scheming Pose.' "I thought that I'd lost one of you today. Please stay safe."

Frisk gave her a big smile, something he'd picked up from Undyne. "We'll be fine, Az! No worries."

She looked at me and I fought a blush.

"We'll be all right. We've trained with Undyne, haven't we?"

Asriel smiled a little and kissed my cheek. Now I was definitely red. She chuckled softly and I sighed, defeated. Turning us toward the ship, Asriel sent us off. We ran up the gangplank. Pulling our ray guns, Frisk walked forward while I walked backwards watching our backs. We checked each room as we went passed. It was eerily quiet.

"Where are you, Sans?" Frisk breathed.

We got to the captain's room off the bridge and found the bodies of the crew carefully laid out. The dead Leaguers were piled unceremoniously in a corner. We went to the bridge. Wilson sat passed out in a chair. Frisk waved some smelling salts under his nose and he jerked awake, coughing. He looked at both of us.

"Where am I?"

Frisk frowned. "The bridge of the ship. What happened?"

"I was helping Sans clear the bodies from the bridge and then I don't remember anything."

I looked at Frisk. "He might have been gassed by Flood's accomplice." I grabbed a third gas mask from the cabinet and tossed it to him. "Let's go find Sans."

We headed back down the hall, listening carefully. An explosion came from the engine room. We ran only to skid to a halt at the door. Sans had tossed his pith helmet into a corner and was working to stabilize the engine's gas core with magic.

"*i'd appreciate it if you boys started fixing this."

Frisk ran for the control panel and checked the read out. "The containment unit is cracked!" He pointed to the cabinet to the right as he shut down the engine. "There's a replacement in there!"

I pulled the new containment unit from the cabinet and rushed over to Frisk. A bit of blue magic had the new unit in place and the Frisk restarted the engine.

He sighed. "How did the containment unit crack? That thing so strong, Dr. Gaster and I argued about whether or not we even needed a replacement on board."

"*flood's partner is somewhere on the ship. he gassed sir wilson and set a bomb on unit to keep me from chasing him." He frowned. "*he headed for the upper deck."

We ran up the stairs and found the cultist signalling Flood from the railing. Wilson tackled him, sending him to the deck. Frisk, Sans, and I grabbed the tow cables and disconnected them, dropping them into the lake. The _Curio_ surfaced and took off, towing nothing behind it. Frisk and I high fived.

Wilson tied up and gagged the cultist. "Let's get everyone back on board and go home."

Thirty minutes later, everyone was on board. I launched the ship back into the air and set a course for home.

Frisk put a hand on my shoulder. "Sans and I are going to catalog the damage to the ship so we know what needs fixed back at the Shipworks. Az is in the Captain's room paying last respects to the crew if you need her."

I nodded and he headed off. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, enjoying the peacefulness that came over me when flying.

Someone collared me, dragging me away from the control panel.

"Chara was it? We had a deal, Chara."

Flood threw me against a wall. My head hit a pipe and I hit the floor, stunned. I groaned, holding my head.

He lifted me up. "For a street rat, you have some nerve to attempt to trick your betters." The metal arm came at my face. I closed my eyes against the inevitable.

The hit didn't come.

Wilson held the arm. "You have some nerve to strike a member of the Dreemurr royal family." Wilson slammed Flood in the face.

Flood dropped me as he stumbled. He hit the floor on his rear and looked up as Asriel stalked up to him, eyes glowing.

"How dare you speak like that to my brother?"

He scrambled to his feet only to be backhanded. The Chaos Saber appeared in Az's hand and she cleaved the metal arm from Flood's body at the shoulder. Wilson tied him up, gagged him, and dragged him away.

Asriel helped me to a chair to check my head. "Are you all right?"

I nodded and put an arm around her. "Thanks, Az."

She hugged me tightly, and I held onto her for a few minutes, breathing in her soft scent.

Okay. _This_ is my favorite place.


	7. Ep 7 - Relic Race

Core Issues: Season Three

by Nicolle

Disclaimer: Undertale is the creation of Toby Fox. Gaster!Sans, who is taking a break from narrating, is the the creation of Borurou. This story is copyrighted to me.

Special Disclaimer: The UT Mob AU Kitten and Don G belong to Junkpile(Junky). I said I would get one of the MOB AUs in here some how, and I managed it!

1\. See author's note at the end.

2\. This story is rated T for language, suggestive jokes/themes, and violence.

3\. The anon reviewer who wanted Shipworks: You're welcome. Read the note at the end. ;)

Ep. 7 - Relic Race

(Army!Frisk/Church is our narrator!)

"The name of the game is Relic Race. Each team of two must collect artifacts from multiple locations in order to win. While doing so we must also face off against puzzles, traps, and strange creatures. Each team gets one turn each round for three rounds to grab an artifact before the timer runs out."

"Oh Man! Why did I agree to this! I HATE puzzles!" Undyne griped.

I put an arm around her. "Yeah. But you do love to win. And we are totally going to leave these guys in the dust!"

She smiled big and fist bumped with me.

"Ready to make these two look like amateurs?" Cross asked.

His Papyrus sat next to him. "OF COURSE."

I laid out the board and set up the cards for puzzles, traps, and creatures. I dug around the box, lifting the insert. "Hmm... No tokens."

Papyrus shrugged. "NO WORRIES. WE'LL JUST MAKE OUR OWN." He pulled a colorful pie bird I recognized as a gift from Cross from his pocket.

Undyne dug in a pocket and pulled out a little pewter fish. Cross pulled out a his St. Canard Paranormal Investigators club card. I pulled out the little silver and enamel sunflower charm my children had given me for my birthday. We placed them on the board.

The moment our tokens touched the start square a light flashed and we were standing outside a large building carved out of a canyon wall. Four large pillars held up a triangular eave filled with beautiful carvings of of animals walking two by two across a savanna.

"WHERE ARE WE?"

I turned a complete circle, looking around before looking down at myself. My lace dress was gone and a pair of khaki shorts, khaki button down, and leather back pack were in its place. "We're in the game."

Cross, clothing also changed to match mine, ran up the steps to look inside the building. "Hey, Church? Where did this game come from?"

"Blue gave it to me." I sighed deeply while frowning.

Cross came back down the stairs. "Any ideas?"

Papyrus looked strange in the shorts and button down. Like he was someone else's Papyrus instead of Cross'. "WE VERY LIKELY MUST COMPLETE THE GAME TO LEAVE IT."

I looked to Undyne. "You still up for this."

She smiled impossibly wide, teeth big and sharp. "Totally. Ten bucks says we can beat the boys to the artifact in the temple here."

We both dashed for the entrance.

"HEY!" both boys yelled, following close on our heels.

Inside the entrance we ran full bore down the hallway for the open gallery and two divergent paths. I let Undyne take the lead and she chose the hall to the right. A glance over my shoulder confirmed that Cross and Papyrus had taken the left. Ahead of us, a pit opened up in the floor. We both jumped, grabbing ropes hanging from the ceiling, and swung across. The hallway made a sharp right and we skidded to a stop in front of a closed gate. We both knelt and tried to get our fingers under to lift. No go.

I looked around the gate's edge and found nothing. Turning around, I saw a large switch pressed against the wall further back the hallway. I ran back and pushed the switch down. The gate slid open and activated several rows of swinging blades. I felt the switch push against me, meaning that as soon as I let go, I would only have a short time to navigate the trap before the gate shut. I waved Undyne through the gate and watched the blades for a moment, counting to time my run.

C chuckled in my ear. "Geez, Frisk. Always in such a rush. Let me handle this."

I smiled as the path lit up over my sight with the timing.

One. Two. I let go of the switch and dashed forward.

Three. Four. Spin right to avoid the blade.

Five. Six. Duck the next blade.

Seven. Eight. Roll.

Nine. Ten. Dive under the closing gate.

Undyne pulled me to my feet and we looked around a large, open gallery of yellowed marble and blue tiling. Fabulous paintings set with jewels covered the walls from floor to ceiling three stories above. The roof had fallen in, beaming bright daylight on top of us. A colossal statue of a beautiful, many armed woman made of white alabaster and leafed in gold dominated the room. The doorway out was above the crown on her golden head. Undyne and I circled the statue, trying to figure out how best to climb it.

She pulled on the bottom most arm and it came down, hand held out like a step. "Check this out. It looks like the rest of the arms will come down in the same way. We just have to reach them."

I stepped back. "You get the arms on the left and I'll get the arms on the right."

"You got it!" Undyne ran over to the wall and started climbing the ledges up to the arms. I found a rope hanging down the wall next to a large, tattered tapestry and tested its strength. Confident that it would hold me I climbed up to the next hand pushed it down as Undyne kicked the on her side into place. I felt the rope hitch and quickly grabbed onto a nearby ledge as the remains of the tapestry fell. I reached out and kicked the next hand down. Undyne reached over and knocked another arm into place and the rest of the arms swung forward, forming a staircase.

"Sweet!"

Undyne dropped down and ran over to spot me as I came down. We ran up the stairway and through the door in a room with a smaller version of the same statue sitting on a pedestal. We stood in front of the statue, looking at it for a moment.

"This is so obviously a trap," Undyne said.

"You wanna spring it and see what happens?"

She smiled and nodded emphatically.

"Get ready to run." I lifted the statue.

There was a deep rumbling as Cross and Papyrus came in through another door. They steadied themselves against the door jamb as a piece of the wall in front of me opened to reveal a path out of the temple. We dashed for it only to skid to a halt as a mass of swinging blade traps activated. Behind us, the roof pulled back and a large stone ball rolled toward us.

"EVERYONE! LAY DOWN FLAT AGAINST THE WALLS!"

We took Papyrus' cue and hit the ground, pressing tightly to the walls on either side of the passage. The stone ball rolled by us, the round shape going through the square hallway meaning it couldn't touch us. We stood to watch it smash apart the traps, raining destruction on the blades.

Cross saw the statue in my hand and ran for me. I ducked his swing while tossing the statue to Undyne. She caught it and ran down the path, deftly picking her way through the debris. We turned to follow, only to be over taken by Papyrus' much longer stride. The end of the tunnel opened up on the dusty outside and Undyne dived for the light, rolling to her feet in the hot sun. She held the statue high and a bright flash over took us.

When the light faded we were in a dark room surrounded by burning torches and two gated doorways down dark corridors. What you could see through the gates glistened, walls slick with slimy wetness. We'd gone through another clothing change as well, looking like cosplayers who'd just walked out of a Dungeons and Dragons convention. Cross and I were dressed as dungeon crawling thieves while Undyne sported a shield with her warrior's armor. Papyrus wore long blue robes like that of a wizard. Undyne grabbed my hand and I grabbed a torch as she pulled me through the gate on the left.

She was clearly enjoying herself despite the odd circumstances and it was hard not to smile with her. I was having fun too.

We crept along the passage and found a doorway on the right. I carefully checked it for traps before picking the lock and letting it carefully open. The room was empty. We continued on. The door suddenly slammed shut. Fighting the urge to run in the opposite direction, I went back to the door and carefully opened it.

The door was jerked out of my hand and a large, humanoid rat stood in front of me, sword raised. It swung and I dove forward, rolling between it's legs. The sword clanged off Undyne's raised shield. She summoned one of her spears and stabbed at the rat man. I pushed him forward into the spear and he disappeared in a puff of smoke. I checked the room more thoroughly this time and found a secret passage.

We crept down the passage and it opened into another room. Three rat men played cards at a table while a captive was chained in a corner.

I collared the first rat man, pulling him backward. When he turned, I punched him in the face hard enough to knock him into the table. The second rat man came at me. I ducked his swing and swung him around to a waiting Undyne, who quickly speared him. She spun around and speared the third rat man as he came around the table. The first rat man sorted himself out enough to come at me again. I stole the keys from his belt before running the knife hidden in my boot through his abdomen. He disappeared like the others.

Undyne rolled the chained captive over. "Frisk? You need to see this."

I knelt down to have a look at the captive in the fire light. It was one of Gaster-Sans-es. He looked to be shorter than Bones, but also considerably older. Well, relatively speaking. Bones was a few hundred years old though he looked to be in his thirties when compared to Sans-es who aged on a human scale. His clothing was tatters at best. I used the keys to unlock the chains and free him. Undyne held him up while I patted his face gently.

His eye sockets opened. One white eye looked up at me. "Kitten...?" He blinked and rubbed skull. "No. Who are you?"

"I'm Frisk. This is Undyne."

He shook his head. "You aren't my Frisk."

I helped him stand. "No. I'm Bones' Frisk."

He frowned. "I don't know who that is."

"How long have you been here?" Undyne asked.

He shook his head. "I don't know. I started playing a game with my consigliere and we ended up here. I don't know what happened to her. The last date I remember seeing is September 4th, 1942."

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, hands balled into fists.

Undyne put her hand on my shoulder. "You're pissed. What gives?"

"Blue," I started. I took a deep breath. "He put me on a mission without telling me. Again." A rush of hot anger ran up my spine. "He's a dead man."

Undyne sighed and patted my shoulder.

C's voice wrapped around my inner ear. "Consigliere? 1942? He's got to be from a mob timeline. Consigliere means advisor or second in command. This guys probably a Don so watch yourself."

I nodded. "Let's concentrate on finding your second in command and then get out of the game."

He gave me a rough smile before nodding for me to lead on. Before I could take a step a light flashed and we ended up outside a massive hedge maze. This outfit change had us in our navy blue Seraph uniforms with the exception of Papyrus and our mysterious Sans. Papyrus was in his everyday black knit top and khaki slacks, while Sans wore a brown checked suit straight out of the forties mob era. Sans stared at Papyrus like he was seeing a ghost.

Cross rushed over. "What happened? You weren't anywhere near us when we got to the artifact." He looked at our newcomer. "I retract my question. Did Blue send us on a mission without telling us we were on a mission?"

"Yes."

"And didn't you tell him last time that if he did it again, you were killing him?"

"Yes."

"Oooooh boy."

Undyne put a hand on my shoulder. "Hey! At least I actually get to be with you on one for once. We never do missions together!"

"Does this mean we need to be looking for more people?" Cross asked.

"I am missing my consigliere."

"Description?"

He raised a hand to indicate me. "They are very similar in appearance to Frisk."

"WHAT IF WE CANNOT FIND HER?"

"Then we play the game again," I said. "Well, Cross and I will."

Undyne and Papyrus both crossed their arms over their chests.

I held up both hands. "Okay. Okay. We'll all play again."

Papyrus looked us over. "IT SEEMS OUR TEAMS ARE NOW UNEVEN."

Cross rolled his eyes. "They were uneven to start." He sneezed, "C!"

C burst to life on my shoulder. "Wah wah wah. Cry me a river."

Sans' momentary shock at seeing C was replaced by an inquisitive look. "What is this?"

C turned to face him. "Short answer, I'm C. Long answer, I'm the soul of Chara Dreemurr and I live in Frisk's head."

"For how long have you been there?"

I blinked, thinking about it. I was twenty three when I fell and I turned 38 a month ago. "Fifteen years now." Had it really been that long?

C, always onto my thoughts, looked at me. "Sophia is nine years old. Brandon is six."

I shook my head. "No. No way." I held out my hands, like I was holding a small child. "They were like this yesterday."

C smiled and kept teasing. "Red's little sister is married. She and Asriel are expecting their third child."

"That's impossible."

Cross chuckled, putting an arm around my shoulders. "Let's go while the going's good."

I nodded and turned to Sans. "Sans? Would you mind going with the boys?"

"You may call me G. And that would be fine."

I nodded. "G then. All right. The plan is to search the maze for G's second in command. Whoever finds them first will comm the other. After that, we make for the artifact in the middle of the maze."

Everyone nodded and we headed into the maze. The hedges went over Undyne's head, making them very tall. Even so, you could make out several white gazebos with blue stripes strategically placed around and above the hedges. C began mapping the maze, highlighting areas so we wouldn't need to back track too much. At the first junction, Undyne and I went right while the boys went left. The path we took led us up to one of the gazebos and a view of the maze from above.

My jaw dropped as we gazed out over the maze. It looked to go on forever in every direction. I could barely even see where we had entered and we'd only been walking for a few minutes. The maze itself swirled and undulated, curving this way and that without rhyme or reason. At least, it didn't seem that way until C began mapping and calculating areas. I made a slow full turn for him, letting him pick up as much of the maze as possible for his map and caught sight of the boys on a different gazebo.

I gave them a wave and Papyrus waved back.

"Frisk. Turn back to your right."

I turned slowly.

"Stop."

I stood still, looking in the direction of another gazebo in the distance. Someone was there, watching us. "Nice catch, C."

I could see his smug smile behind my eyes. "Let's go. I still want to beat Cross."

Undyne and I headed off in the direction of the person we saw. We followed C's directions and came up to the gazebo to find no one on it. We searched the area and found a set of tracks leading deep into the maze. I stopped before following them.

I knelt to get a closer look. "These aren't human tracks. They look like a woman's shoe, but the step placement is wrong."

Undyne knelt next to me, looking over the tracks. "Are we looking for a human or a monster?"

"G mistook me for his second back in the dungeon. That's a good indication that they're human."

Undyne nodded in agreement. "I vote we follow the tracks and see who owns them."

"Agreed."

We quietly followed the tracks deep into the maze. After multiple twists and turns the tracks stopped completely at a dead end. Undyne and I searched the hedge wall looking for a path through and found nothing. Undyne lifted me up onto her shoulders and I looked over the hedge wall to see... nothing. A white mist obscured my vision.

"I figured out how the maze just stops you from running along the top. It's all fog up here."

Undyne grimaced. "And it was clear as day from the gazebos. I suppose that's our only hints. Any ideas?"

I frowned as I jumped down.

My comm crackled to life. "Hey, Church? Are you guys seeing a person or persons in the maze but the tracks are wrong?"

Undyne and I looked at each other. "Yeah. What do you make of it?"

"What ever they are, they just lead you to dead ends. We're ignoring them and heading for the next gazebo closer to the center."

I cocked my head toward the Sushi Roll. "Want to follow their lead?"

She nodded.

"We'll head to the next gazebo too."

I lead the way and we climbed up the next gazebo. Looking around, you could see more of the shadow people in other gazebos, running off into the maze. I caught sight of the boys closer to the center than we were. They were checking out the gazebo itself. I looked over the edge of ours and noticed that the gazebo sat on top of an enclosed tower. I motioned for Undyne to follow me back down the stairs. Walking around the gazebo, I saw a seam in the paint, like someone had painted over a door. I pushed on it and it swung open stiffly to reveal a stairway down.

I tapped my comm. "Cross? We found a stairway underneath the gazebo we're at. We're going to follow it and see where it goes."

I could almost hear his frown. "I don't like that idea."

"Do you want me to wait for you to come to us?"

He sighed. "I don't have a way over to you that gets us there in anything like a decent amount of time. Just stay in contact."

"Will do."

I pulled out my flashlight and we descended into the dark. The stairway ended in a long stone corridor. We followed it for what seemed like an hour and it opened into a large circular room with multiple corridors leading into it in an eight pointed star formation. The dust on the floor was thick and left a very evident trail. A woman's shoe, about my size, walking down one of the corridors. Undyne and I smiled.

I tapped my comm and got no response. Sighing, we followed the trail. Again, it felt like we were were walking forever until we came to a new circular room with more corridors. Here the tracks went everywhere, like the person wearing the shoes was trying each path in turn and coming back. After looking at the tracks for a bit, I figured out which trail was the last exit from the room and followed it.

The corridor went on forever and felt a hundred times more claustrophobic with each step. Even Undyne was huddling in on herself, ducking the low ceiling. We came into another circular room and another set of tracks going every where. This time, they seemed more frantic. Like the owner was starting to feel lost and afraid. I frowned, taking my time to pick up the trail. I narrowed it down to two possibilities and marked both with chalk.

Undyne picked the first of the two and we followed it into another circular room. She guessed right, because instead of a mess of foot prints, we found a woman a bit younger than I sitting with their arms wrapped around drawn up legs, chin resting on their knees.

They looked up at us, face blank. "Are you real or have I finally gone mad?"

"We're real."

They shook their head. "Impossible. You look like me and Undyne."

I sat down next to her. "I look like you. But I'm not you. I'm married, with children."

Undyne sat with us. "And while I'm willing to bet your Undyne is different from me, I am also willing to bet that she'd not be happy to see you sitting on your ass like this."

They looked between us and sighed. "I don't know how long I've been wandering down here. How long I've been lost. I followed one of those damn shadows down here thinking it was my boss. I don't know where he is either."

"We do. Cracks in his skull here and here." I indicated the placement with my finger on my own face. "He's with our friends top side." I offered her a hand. "I can get us above ground."

They looked at me for a moment before standing on their own. "Lead on."

Using C's map, I guided us back to the stairwell and up to the gazebo. The sky darkened as storm clouds moved in. I tapped my comm. "Cross?"

"Church! It's about time! I've been trying to get a hold of you for four hours!"

"Sorry about that. The comms went down underground. I found G's Frisk."

Silence greeted me and I smiled, waiting.

Undyne rolled her eyes and looked at the Frisk next to her. "Be prepared to run."

"Last one to the artifact is a rotten egg!"

I giggled and dashed into the maze, Undyne and Frisk on my heels. C plotted the route ahead of me, leading me turn by turn to the center. Thunder cracked overhead and I slowed to be sure Undyne and Frisk could keep up with me. C altered my path suddenly and I followed it just as the sky opened up and rain began to pour. I came up on a staircase leading up to the artifact, a large, silver globe. I climbed and as I did, I saw Cross half way up to it from the side. He noticed me and doubled his pace, causing him to slip, and slide down. We both scrambled up the increasingly muddy path, reaching for the artifact by our finger tips.

There was a flash of light and we were back at the table in Cross' apartment in the clothing we started in. The table in front of us was empty but for our personal tokens. I picked up my little sunflower charm.

"We did it!" Cross looked around, smile falling. "Where's the mob Frisk and Sans?"

"*back where they belong, when they belong. hopefully they're encasing the game in cement and dumping it in the ocean as we speak."

I spun around, knocking the chair over as I stood. I pulled out my phone as I stalked up to Blue. "Fase? Would you be so kind as to lock down my timeline and short cutting on it for the next five minutes?"

Fase's cheery voice fell from the phone. "Certainly! Done! But why?"

"*oh crap." Blue ran for the door.

I shot out the door after him. "You can run, but you can't hide!"

Author's Note:

Season Three, episode seven was going to be last Core Issues. It was going to be over. The End. Goodnight. Take a bow.

And then I wrote a freaking cliff hanger.

That sound you heard was my heading hitting my desk.

The episode you just read was written after I wrote the cliff hanger so I can use it for episode one of Season Four.

That's right! There will be a season four of Core Issues. That said, you are in for a wait. The first episode will not appear until late September. I am coming up on the busiest time of the year for my job at the same time that we are switching to a new system in which to work. It's going to be crazy for a bit, but so long as there's someone who's reading, I'll keep writing.

This time around, I am going to write several episodes of core issues before you even see the first one. If you have some characters or AUs you'd like to see, any favorites from the series you really enjoy reading about, let me know. I've said this before but I'll reiterate: Flowerfell is out. It is a completely closed system, the creators really don't want anyone to do anything with it, and will only get a mention at best.

I also want to work on a Shipworks mini series that will be it's own thing. So for all the people who've reviewed or pm'd me saying "Shipworks! Shipworks!": You're getting your wish! Like Colonytale, I will write all five episodes of the mini series I have planned before the first one gets posted and then I'll post one episode a week.

And, thank you.


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